Rambling on a rehearsal day.

I am starting to feel settled in as the Director for Little Red Studio.  Going from a volunteer to paid staff has been difficult for me.  The Studio has always been about doing what I want to do. Having and element of obligation has been irritating.  Which is strange, since I really don't want to not be involve with the Studio.  It's the idea that I have to do something that feels weird. 

I think the biggest element in this feeling awkward has to do with the philosophy that is the basis for why LRS is so special. There is a book called The Gift by Lewis Hyde that talks about the importance of being in the gift economy when doing anything creative or erotic in order to grow the energy.  It's akin to the saying "You have to love in order to be loved" or any other truism that suggests that you have to give away something in order to receive something. And this is gifting I am referring to; not trade. When you trade, you expect something back. When you give a gift, for it to truly be a gift, you must expect nothing in return, including an acknowledgment. Jeff once wrote an essay about this philosophy that you can read here.

When I became a paid staff member, the portion of my LRS involvement that is administrative in nature was pulled out of the gift economy and thrust into the money economy.  And that makes sense. Jeff needs to know that this work will get done at a certain time and in a certain way.  One can't have those expectations when in the gift economy.  My art and performances will still be in the gift economy and I am glad of that so I can reap the benefits of increase that come with the act of giving away that energy.  That is something I will not give up.  That is an integral part of being involved with the Little Red Studio for me.

So, tonight I go and do my duty as the Director.  And tomorrow, I play at being the Director.  A small distinction, but one that was important for me to make for myself in this transition since I am performing less often.

Little Red Studio tickets are available online at Brown Paper Tickets for $25 until 6pm the day of a show. We then have tickets available at the door between 8 and 9pm for $30.  Since we set the program the night before, I can't tease you with what the show will be like until the day of the show. If you are curious. Check back tomorrow and I'll post a sneak peek.