I didn't mean to get political...

Once upon a time I bought an old American flag at a thrift store. It had 48 stars on it an it was in good condition, only a little yellowed with age. I took it to Jim Duvall and said I wanted to do something with it, as in make art. I feel really strongly that I am fortunate to be a woman in America, at this time and place. For the most part, I have a lot of freedom to pursue my sexuality and I wanted to say something artistically to reflect that.

That was 4 years ago. Since there have been numerous conversations and nothing seemed "right" and everything seemed to cliche. A few months ago, Jim suggested that I be the flag pole. I had only recently relaxed my stance on temporary piercings and any type of BDSM play that resulted in blood.  While I was still leery of the prospect, he convinced me that it would make a great photo to have the flag streaming in the wind from my body.

"But how does the reflect on my sexuality?"

"Oh! We could put you in the burqa head piece..."

"Wait! What about putting the flag upside down? That's a distress signal."

And so we went form there. Finding someone to pierce me with the hooks was easy, (far easier than it should have been, in my opinion) scheduling was a bit trickier. After a few weeks of negotiating, we had a date. As with most photoshoots with a narrow goal, the prep took a while and the actual shoot was about 15 minutes before Jim was convinced we had the shot.

For the record, yes, getting pierced hurt. The flapping flag in the wind machine only hurt a tiny bit,it mostly just felt odd.

Though is is different that I originally planned, I am pleased with the final product. I have been enjoying the conversations it have evoked. What do you see?

Next class: Beyond Verbal Communication

Photo By Jim Duvall

I was thinking of making some silly "back to school" reference, but let's face it, most of us never stop learning when it comes to our sexuality and personal evolution.

As the new Director of Education for the Foundation for Sex Positive Culture, I have been talking to everyone I come in contact with about what workshops they are interested in attending. I have gotten some really good feedback and am working on getting more classes on relationship skills and sex focused skills.

One person answered "I want to take a class that's all about how to read my bottom." Followed by a chorus of affirmative agreement. Well that's easy! I have one of those classes up my sleeve!

So, on September 15th, a Saturday, Jim Duvall and I will be at the CSPC from 5pm - 7pm to present "Going Beyond Verbal Communication." This class is a great primer on body language and how to use it to enhance your communication. Whether you are in a long term relationship or interested in doing some pick up play, this class will give you valuable tools when relating with others. You will be amazed at how much more informed you will be about the people you interact with based purely on your observations. It's also fascinating how much more informed you will be able yourself and  how you unconsciously send out signals.

Come out the the class, learn some cool stuff. Go out to dinner to fuel up and digest the new information. Then come back to the CSPC at 8pm to Fettered or Power Play Mixed Tape, and use your new skills!


Here's the nuts and bolts:

Where: Annex
When: 5pm -7pm
Cost: $20

Body language, tone of voice, rate of speech and posture are powerful ways we send cues to our partner, often louder than words. Non-verbal communication can be a rich source of information, especially when gags are used, or you have a partner that slips into a deep headspace where words don’t seem to exist. With careful attention, you can use these subtle forms of communication to enhance your play, whether you are a top or a bottom. We will show you techniques for gathering visual, tactile and auditory information before and during a scene to create more fluid and intuitive play. Imagine not needing to ask your bottom “Are you ok?”
Come prepared to participate in group and paired exercises. If you come without a partner, we will find you a partner for the exercises.