Dynamic Shenanigans

We need an Installation Art Director!

2012-02-07T22:45:00.000-08:00

The Installation Art Director has an interesting role, interfacing directly with artists who are creating interactive work for the Festival. He/she works closely with me to curate the incoming submissions, dole out the grant funding we have to offer, and facilitate these projects reaching fruition. It's a fun job that requires an open mind, a sense of humor, good organization skills, some artistic sensibilities, and the unique style of diplomacy necessary to successfully manage artists.

Please share the above with anyone you think might be interested. They can contact the Seattle Erotic Art Festival's Director at clayton@seattleerotic.org with questions or to express interest.

More art!

2012-02-04T20:07:00.000-08:00

Last night I had an art date with a dear friend of mine, Leopold. Once upon a time, when we were both a part of the Little Red Studio Troupe, we had discussed an ambient performance for a gender themed show that Jim Duvall had proposed. The time had finally come when we were both in a space to revisit that idea. Jim was very receptive and immediately put forth his suggestions. A collaboration had begun!

A lot of detail and thought and meticulous planning went into this shoot. Way more than I usually do. I hope you enjoy the results.


Photo by Jim Duvall, Sophia Sky & Leopold

Call for Art Open Now!

2012-02-01T08:39:00.000-08:00

Our fabulous webmaster/IT guru has the submission site up and running!

Go to www.SeattleErotic.org to register and submit your art.

The Seattle Erotic Art Festival is accepting art submissions February 1 through March 10, 2012 for the tenth annual event, the biggest and best year yet. The Festival will be held June 16-24.

The Festival is calling for:
     *visual art of all media
     *short film
     *installation art
     *literary art
     *performance art
     *DJs
     *and items for the popular Festival Store.

All artists 18 years old or older are encouraged to submit art for consideration. The Festival accepts art from artists across the nation and world, and there is no submission fee to apply for artists living outside of North America. The deadline is Saturday, March 10 at 11pm PST.The early-bird deadline (for discounted submission fees) is Wednesday, February 15 at 11pm PST.

Artists may submit once for as many Calls for Art as they wish, but note that each Call for Art has distinct requirements and may have additional submission fees. View the navigation tabs for details about each call for art.Click here for an overview of the benefits accepted and declined artists receive, and a summary of all the submission fees.

Summary of the Submission Process

The submission process is quick and easy, and the site will guide you through each step.If you have questions, you can click a Icon_info to learn more, and/or visit the FAQIf you still need assistance, contact info@SeattleErotic.org.

You will need to create an account with your email and password, by clicking the link that says Register (In the dark gray column on the left side of the page).
The next step is to add your artist profile. This includes your legal name and contact information.
You will then select what type of art you would like to submit.
If a submission fee is required, you will be prompted to pay the submission fee before you can apply.
Invited artists will enter a discount code to waive the submission fee.
The final step is submitting your art for consideration. There are different requirements depending on the type of art you are submitting for consideration. Please view the navigation tabs for details about each one. Details will also be included during the submission process.

Seattle Erotic Art Festival CALL FOR ART -- February 1 to March 10

2012-01-25T11:09:00.000-08:00

The Seattle Erotic Art Festival’s Call for Art is open February 1 to March 10, 2012. All artists 18+ from across the world are encouraged to submit visual art, short film, literary art, installation art, performance art, DJ proposals, and work for the Festival Store.

The Festival anticipates over 10,000 attendees in June -- don’t miss your chance to be part of the biggest and best year yet. Plus all accepted artists receive many special benefits.

Submit your work for consideration online at SeattleErotic.org.

Take advantage of early-bird (discounted) submission fees up until 11pm PST on Wednesday, February 15. The Call for Art closes at 11pm PST on Saturday, March 10. All artists outside of North America can apply for free.

10th Anniversary Seattle Erotic Art Festival is June 16-24, 2012 at Fremont Studios.

Help me decide!

2012-01-24T23:21:00.000-08:00

So this is a relatively minor thing in the grand scheme of things. However, after attending the funeral of a dear man, I am feeling the need for frivolity. Shoes.

I have a credit at Nordstrom's that I keep forgetting to use. So I'm shopping on line and I am stuck. I have narrowed it down to 3 choices:

Miz Mooz 'Tillman' Pump

Steve Madden 'Troopa' Boot

Steve Madden 'Hottness' Pump

I do need a basic pair of boots that are simple, easy to get on and not fetishy. I don't need another pair of heels, but I do want those pumps as they are super sexy. Your votes and comments are appreciated.

Catharsis - Part 2

2011-12-10T16:13:00.000-08:00

If you have a stomach for blood, check out Jim Duvall's photos of me with lots of blood in a bath tub. If you don't, they are a series of photos of me "using" a straight razor to cut my wrist, covering myself with blood and masturbating. (Good lord, I just wrote that, didn't I?)

There has been a lot of fussing and arguing and discussion about these photos. It has been wonderful seeing so many people talking about art that I helped make. The most fascinating part has been reading all the the motivations that have been assigned to the creators. I thought I would share my story behind my involvement in these photos and my part of the collaborative process.

I've been squeamish about blood, needles, hooks and cuttings ever since I found out people did that in their BDSM play. For being the kid who used to pick my scabs so I could suck the blood, and the menstruating woman who had no qualms about getting messy, it seems strange upon contemplation. I spent some time recently trying to figure out how blood play came to be something I was squicked by.

When I was 17, Planned Parenthood implemented HIV screening. The receptionist really pushed me to check the boxes of risk factors I wasn't sure of, because "it's better to just say yes if you aren't 100% sure the answer is no." So, I had had blood drawn for the first time in my life to test me for a really scary disease no one knew a whole lot about except that it killed you. When you are nervous because something is new and scared this new thing will uncover terrible information, one is understandably going to make some associations. The nurse took two very small (5cc's or less) vials of blood and I exclaimed in panic "You're taking too much!"

Another correlation is that I had a hysterectomy before I got involved in the public BDSM scene so my relationship to blood had changed by the fact that I could no longer bleed for 5 days and survive. My opinion for the last 8 years has been that my blood should stay inside of me.

I've been poking at this fear of blood play a bit since I began dating Jim, mostly because he gets off on fear and I figure this is something I can give him that won't be psychologically damaging for me. I have done needle play with him a handful of times. Literally, five times. I have done a hook pull. A dear friend who is fond of medical staples has had a go at me twice. Mind you, this is over a 5 year period. I was slowly edging into doing more with fantasies bubbling up of more intense blood related scenes. Mostly keeping them as fantasies.

And then I saw a scene that made it possible for me to grok bloodlust. I was out at Paradise and the lovely Lorelei and a play partner of her's set up in the middle of the field, him braced against a stone pillar and her dressed all in white, including stylish white sunglasses as eye protection. She began the scene using a chainmail flogger to "bring the blood to the surface" and just as it started to break his skin, she switched to piercing him with largish gauge needles. Now, he had done a bit of research and determined how he could decrease the clotting factors in his blood for the express purpose of having a bloodier scene. When Lorelei pulled the needles out of his back, the blood streamed down. She resumed flogging him and on every back swing, that chainmail flogger left more blood on her white outfit. The splattering was quite artful. Every few strokes, she would pause a moment, sometimes even pressing into him, making bloody marks on the front of her hips and breasts where she had hugged him.

I really understood the concept of blood lust watching that scene. The blood pouring out of those piercings was so full of life. The rich red colour was astoundingly beautiful. Passionate is the word that keeps coming to mind. The life force represented by his blood and the way she reveled in it was mesmerizing.

Yeah, I wanted to feel that direct connection with life force.

So, I boldly asked a friend if she would want to do some blood play with me, perhaps in the context of a photo shoot. If something is for art, it's always easier for me. She and Jim started talking about using his claw foot tub as the centerpiece. A date was set for her to draw my blood and the rest is history.

Now, I have had very little experience with suicide so it's not as an emotionally charged subject for me as it is for others. While I did do a tiny bit of cutting as a teenager, it wasn't something that I did with regularity or sincerity. For me, being in that bath tub with my own blood sprayed all over me, it was all about reveling in that life force. I was covered in blood red passion. Literally, blood red. The texture of the blood was enticing and sexy. The idea that I could touch the essence of life was overwhelmingly powerful. I became giddy during the shoot an it had everything to do with playing in that taboo substance.

When we filled the tub and the blood tinged the water, my experience changed. Bathing in life giving blood is profound. I was in a primordial womb of my own making. Emerging from that bath was like birthing myself. The fear I had once had about my blood being outside of my body seemed silly, now. Having your blood outside of your body didn't have to be traumatic and dangerous. Facing one's fears does not always yield the expected results. I certainly didn't think I would be so excited to do something like that again.

This account doesn't mean that all of those other thoughts and opinions about those photos aren't valid. Not in the least. Art means whatever it means to you. There is no right answer. Yes, the artist is often trying to communicate something. And it's ok if what you see in art is different than the artist intended. Really, that can't be helped. Good art gives you a chance to see something inside of yourself. It confronts your beliefs and feelings on any given subject, sometimes in a jarring way.

Help the Seattle Erotic Art Festival change the world!

2011-12-09T15:32:00.000-08:00

We are delighted to announce the Festival's brand new Art Activist Society.

Together we can strengthen our community, support artists across the nation and world, and change the way people think about art, sex and sexuality.

Become a Society member for an annual gift of $250 or more, and receive special benefits while supporting the Festival's mission and long-term goals.

All Society members enjoy benefits like tickets to Festival events, VIP entry and rewards, a special members-only party, discounts to workshops, and more.

Higher membership levels receive benefits like discounts on art purchases from the Festival exhibition and Store, a piece of art from the Festival's private collection, an invitation for two to observe the jury process and attend the Artist Reception before the Festival, and so much more.

Learn about our membership levels and join the Society.

Be part of bringing the Festival to life, and making our 10th anniversary the best year yet.

This is a very exciting program. One of the reasons that I am part of the Seattle Erotic Art Festival is that I want to change the way our society perceives and relates to sexuality. Art is an incredible way to educate and illustrate that all forms of sexuality have beauty and are valid forms of expression. Please join us in this mission.

Dojo of the Five Element Rope

2011-12-06T15:23:00.000-08:00

Date & Time:	Sunday, December 11, 2011 ·11:00 AM – 3:30 PM
Location:	Center for Sex Positive Culture - Main Space 1602 15th Ave. W. Seattle, WA 98119 @ map
Cost:	Cost: $25 each or $40 for both
Dress code:	Loose clothing that you can move easily in and a piece of 6 mm hemp or jute rope that is approximately 20' long.
	Tantra arrived in Japan in the 8th century where it began an interweaving with traditional shamanic Shinto and the sublime Taoist magic of refugees arriving from the fallen Chinese Tang Dynasty. The intermingling of these deeply complimentary magical and spiritual practices of the Far East was unique and became known as Mikkyo. Mikkyo was later adapted advantageously into the foundations of many primordial Japanese military/sword cults. One particular style of bakujo called senyojo: battlefield rope arresting techniques - became a crucial tool for the safe and secure transport of valuable captured prisoners from the battle theater. Our bakujo arrest & capture/restraint applications are explored utilizing the foundations of Mikkyo (Tantric and Taoist Magical operations) to inform and balance the psyche and spirit of the practitioner under perilous 'battlefield' conditions. The practical side of this training offers a rough & tumble approach to classical Japanese rope restraint, whereas the esoteric side affords insights phenomenally intrinsic to the power-play between operator and receiver. 11am-1pm Class 1: demonstration, history, theory, energies, etiquette (reshiki) (No limit) 1:30pm-3:30pm Class 2: hands-on instruction and practice of basic techniques (te hodoki) (Limited to 20 participants.) Bret and Eric have been practitioners of this martial art for a collective 28 years. Though there are many branches of bakujo, senyojo was the branch most focused on by the bushi (samurai). The two main categories of senyojo they do are called hayanawa (fast rope) and shin no nawa (true/real rope). The instructors will provide rope for sale that is the proper length and type for bakujo. When: December 11, 2011 Where: CSPC Main Space Time: Part 1: 11am – 1pm Part 2: 1:30pm – 3:30pm This is a FSPC event. CSPC discounts do not apply RSVP required to WorkshopRSVP@sexpositiveculture.org – limited space available in second class

CSPC Annual Board Fundraiser

2011-11-10T10:07:00.000-08:00

Soirée des Désirs: Featuring Jeff Gord and Twisted Monk

The Center and Foundation for Sex Positive Culture are proud to present the second annual fundraiser Soirée des Désirs, featuring captivating performances by Jeff Gord and Twisted Monk.
The first half of the night features Jeff of the incomparable House of Gord, using engineering skills, ingenuity, tight bondage, intense sensation, and beautiful women to create a kinky spectacle. This year Jeff’s performance will be uncensored: there will be penetration and partial nudity.
The second half of the night features the infamous performer, rope maker and bondage expert Twisted Monk Join him as he takes his unique brand of cabaret, bondage and twisted humor to new and erotic places through multiple, gravity defying suspension acts.
You don’t want to miss this sexy fundraiser. Come enjoy:

two performances by fascinating figures in the community
live and silent auction featuring a variety of enticing items
sexy servers offering tasty hors d’oeuvres
special giveaways
full bar
… and more!

21 + ONLY
We have an extremely limited number of $50 VIP tickets, which include:

reserved seating right up front
special attention from the performers
sexy servers offering tasty treats just for VIPs, including a delicious dessert
certificate for half off a Foundation workshop of your choice
and a chance to win a special prize!

The next show I am attending: Embodied

2011-11-08T00:02:00.000-08:00

Embodied
November 9th and 10th. 2011
8pm – 10pm
FRED Wildlife Refuge
127 Boylston St
Seattle, WA 98102

Embodied is a one-woman show illustrating a musical journey, and a rare public performance including much of my original music and distinctive cover songs. It depicts the sense of the personality fragmentation in youth, and the experience of slowly piecing ones self together to truly be a whole person. There will be live music, stunning visuals, palpable energy and an aerial performance. Anyone who enjoys being moved by the dark, melancholy, and profound will love this show.

Artist, performer, director and writer: Courtnee Papastathis (also as Zita the Aerialist)
Sound Engineering, back-up: Edgars Klepers
Visuals and Lights: Courtnee Papastathis and Miked Up Productions.

Tickets are $20 at Brown Paper Tickets and at the door, space permitting.

I'll be attending the Thursday showing. Anyone else interested in going that day and want to meet up?

Catharsis - Part 1

2011-11-03T17:37:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: All the photos and most of the links provided below are NSFW.

Background: When I talk about being raised by wolves, I am speaking both literally** and figuratively. The popular culture connotation of the metaphor is to denote someone who doesn't behave within normal social parameters due to their childhood. My father was a drug addict and dealer most of my childhood. Needless to say, that warps how you view and interact with the world. I didn't realize that many events in my childhood were not normal until about 5 years ago when I broke the rule of secrecy. I was continually surprised that telling stories from when I was a kid that I think are funny and quirky often elicit shocked or horrified reactions. And let's not forget how difficult it is to have love relationships with men when your father stole from, neglected, and used you as a tool to abuse others.

Recent history: My father died in August. I talked to him 3 times in the 8 months before he died after not having contact with him for 13 years due to his continued drug use. He was still using and drinking up to the very end. It's why he died. Heart, liver & kidney failure at 56 is not surprising when you have been doing drugs for 35 years. Anyway, I got want I wanted which was an apology. Even though it was a bit empty, and there were so many lies in those conversations, it was something.

So, I fell apart. The one thing in my life that had been a constant source for knowing who I am and who I didn't want to be, was suddenly gone. The grief has been acute. I vacillate between feeling bereft and furious, and occasionally, they are simultaneous. His death has altered how I view my beloved step-father in an unexpected and lovely way. I feel like I can finally call him "dad" without insulting him. It has also cause me to fear that my partners who are "daddy" to me will leave since I don't need a replacement for a living, inadequate father figure. Abandonment feels imminent because the father not only chose to do drugs than maintain a relationship with the daughter, her died and left forever truly eliminating the possibility of a relationship forever. Therefore, the daughter must not be worthy.

I got tired of flailing in my daily life. I am sure my partners and friends were on their way to being tired of it, even if they won't say so out loud. Art seemed like the logical answer to exorcize these demon-fears. I already had a shoot scheduled with Jim Duvall and a friend who was going to draw my blood so we could do a series of "suicide in the bathtub" photos. I asked Jim if we could do something around drug addiction at the same time. It seemed fitting with the use of the needles for the suicide photos. (I'll talk about those photos in the next post.)

A few days before the shoot, I was inspired to take one of my little sundresses and ruin it. I soaked it in mud puddles, ripped it up and spilled some of my drawn blood on it. I was going to look as underage as possible. This was about the death of that little girl whose life had been damaged by drug abuse. It isn't a literal depiction of what my childhood was like. The photo is cathartic, not autobiographical. 15 minutes before our medical technician friend was due to arrive for the shoot, I had a meltdown, complete with crying and yelling. Once we figured out the things I was freaking out on were not even remotely what I was mad about, we chose to still do the shoot. I wanted to work with the rawness I was feeling so I could use it up and get it out of me.

This is the result of that catharsis.

Jim, who rarely titles his art, is calling this piece "Her Father's Legacy".

I started crying when he told me. It hit the center of the bullseye of all my pain.

"Why did you call it that?"

"Because that pain was all that he left you."

"He didn't have anything else to give me."

As soon as those words left my mouth, I knew that was the truth. My father had never done the hard work of healing from his horribly abusive childhood. His drug use was a desperate attempt to cover up and run away from his pain. And in doing so, his wife and children paid dearly for the crime of just being in his vicinity. Of course there were good times mixed in there. And he wasn't doing the same single drug so there were periods where his drug of choice made his behaviour mild or genial. Those goo time made the bad times that much worse. Those good times taught us that he could be nice and good to us, he just chose not to all the time.

This photo is mufti-layered for me. Her addiction is wanting the love, approval and attention of her father and, like any addict, is willing to go through anything to get it. She's scared, sad, lost and defeated, and ashamed of the hope for something better ore more. But notice also that she is healthy looking, not thin or pale. She can take out the needle and walk away. She doesn't realize that she is whole and continues to look outside herself.

I also see what I think some of my father's pain was when I look at this photo. I can only imagine what pain he felt so acutely that he chose to self-medicate, numbing himself. I have seen the photos of him as a child, with a haunted look that no 8 year-olds should wear. His fear must have been great to continue avoiding his past, even when he slowly lost the involvement of his relatives in his life.

This photo is a reminder that not everything in life is pretty. And there is ugliness in all of our lives, and we don't have to wallow in it. We can take the needle out of arm and reach up for that light coming in from the window.

**My father also had a penchant for owning wolves and wolf hybrid dogs. The one he had the longest, was a female who considered herself the alpha female of the pack, e.g. our family. My brother and I were treated like cubs, and corrected by the wolf as such. My father viewed us getting bit to mean we had obviously done something wrong and we deserved it. So, I have some weird ways regarding how I interact with people that relate directly to wolf pack hierarchy.

What I am doing tonight:

2011-10-25T07:13:00.000-07:00

Seattle Erotic Art Festival Presents: Christopher Ryan of "Sex at Dawn"

Enjoy a lively discussion of this New York Times bestseller!

date:	Tuesday, October 25, 2011
time:	06:00 PM to 08:00 PM
where:	MOHAI (Museum of History and Industry)
address:	2700 24th Ave. E. (In the Auditorium, lower level) map

cost:

$10

Seattle Erotic Art Festival is delighted to present an intimate evening with Christopher Ryan, co-author of Sex at Dawn: The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality.

This award winning New York Times bestseller reexamines much of what we think we know about sex.
Newsweek states it’s: “Funny, witty, and light . . . the book is a scandal in the best sense, one that will have you reading the best parts aloud and reassessing your ideas about humanity’s basic urges well after the book is done.”

Seattle’s Dan Savage says it’s: “The single most important book about human sexuality since Alfred Kinsey unleashed Sexual Behavior in the Human Male on the American public in 1948.”
Ryan will provide an engaging presentation followed by questions and conversation. Books will be available for purchase and Ryan will be signing copies.

TICKETS ON SALE NOW!

18+ only

This event is part of Arts Crush

The Seattle Erotic Art Festival is proud to participate in Arts Crush, a month-long King County festival featuring hundreds of events across the region, happening throughout October.
This is one of many sexy events we're putting on for Arts Crush, most of which are FREE -- learn more and save the dates!

A Halloween Party to Support SEAF 2012

2011-10-25T00:11:00.000-07:00

I am very excited about Seduction, the Seattle Erotic Art Festival's First Halloween party!

Not only have I had a blast picking out the art for the showcase, but Jim Duvall and I were asked to do a variation on our Bondage Aerial performance with an extra treat. Our performance slot is 8:30pm to 9:15pm.

Seduction, Seattle’s Sexiest Halloween Party, is this Saturday!

See and be seen at this alluring night of amazing music and dancing, hand-picked erotic art, hot performances, full bar and absinthe bar, and of course lots of delicious eye-candy. Plus a costume contest with over $1,000 in sexy prizes.

With three gorgeous rooms of music and dancing and over a dozen of Seattle’s top DJs -- including Michael Manahan (Decibel, Starborne), Riz Rollins (KEXP), and Hendrik (Church of Bass, Chillography) -- Seduction is the place to celebrate your Halloween.

THIS SATURDAY, October 29, 8pm to 2am
At the lush Fremont Studios
21+ only

Tickets are on sale now and selling fast.
Purchase your tickets today.

Advance ticket sales end Friday at 11pm. Tickets will be available at the door starting at 8pm, while supplies last.

Lots more details about Seduction are available at SeattleErotic.org.

Moving into Understanding

2011-10-04T12:52:00.000-07:00

Kinesthetic Polyamoury with Jim Duvall & Sophia Sky

Thu, October 6, 7pm – 9pm

Center for Sex Positive Culture - Annex

1608 15th Ave. W. Seattle, WA 98119

$20 per person and $10 for each partner you bring with you.

Knowing something in our heads often isn't a complete understanding. Knowing something "in your gut" often gives a deeper understanding. Using physical activities, this class explores the various polyamourous relationship configurations and inspires understanding, empathy and compersion for your partners. Techniques adapted from Tai Chi, Contact Dance and Systems based Psychology will give you the opportunity to learn more about your unique relationship dynamic. Attending with your current partners is recommended and not required to benefit from this workshop. This class is designed for singles, partners, leather families. Please come prepared to participate in movement based techniques and a discussion about your experiences. (This is a fully accessible class.)

I am very excited about this class. It's quite a departure for me in relation to my other classes. This is more about body and heart than head. (If you haven't noticed, I am mostly a head person.)

This class came out of an experience that GrayDancer had doing a Tai Chi exercise, that is normally done between 2 people, with 2 people at the same time. He experienced it as a metaphor for polyamoury. He has graciously given his blessing to our ideas to expand this idea of internalizing concepts and gaining empathy on a kinesthetic level.

I hope you'll join us!

Come and see me perform for Arts Crush!

2011-10-04T10:53:00.000-07:00

Jim Duvall & I will be doing a rope bondage performance while David Jones recites his potent poetry.

What: Dangerous Liaisons featuring The Libertine Ball

Time: Friday, October 14 at 8:00pm - October 15 at 12:00am

Location: The Mix
6006 12th Ave. S
Seattle, WA

More Info:
Step back in time into a sensual world of scandal, love, danger, and
intrigue based on the once-banned novel from 18th century Paris. An
interactive show like no other will dazzle your senses throughout an
enchanting evening of poetry, theatre, music, dance and visual art put
on by Seattle's own Floating Mountain Poets. As the season of masquerade

approaches, come dressed to impress for the costumed Libertine Ball
where fantasy and fetish conquer moral restraint in an artistic
palette of physical pleasures, experienced through the five senses.

Doors at 7:30 pm. Show starts at 8 pm.

Tickets $15 at https://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/192844

$10 Tickets at the door if you come in costume!

I'll fly away!

2011-08-31T09:40:00.000-07:00

I love to sing. Back when I was involved with the Little Red Studio, there were a few skits I organized where we formed a choir and sang. Those are still my favourite experiences of all 8 years at the Studio.

I miss the Studio. Something fierce. I miss being surrounded by so many artists of so many flavours. I miss the collaborations. I miss learning new skills. Hell, I even miss wrangling said artists when I was the director. All that can be summed up: I miss being caught up in the creative energy of a vibrant arts community.

So, I am going to go find myself a choir to sing in. I love singing. I'm not great at it so perhaps I'll sign up at one of the local community colleges so I can get a wee bit of coaching. I don't want to become a professional. I do want to perform, but only for the joy of sharing music. I just want to sing. With lots of other people. (If I didn't have to sit through a church service, I would rather join a church choir because they have the best songs.)

Maybe I could gather up all the people who joined voices with me at LRS for a reunion choir to sing "I'll Fly Away".

Summer classes!

2011-07-21T12:10:00.000-07:00

I have a fair number of workshops that I am teaching this summer. One is tonight. I know, I'm a slacker about this whole promotion thing sometimes. I got caught up researching the 5 senses again, and of course I found new information. Jim and I are in a low level battle about how much geeky info I get to include in the workshop.

Here's the current line up and I hope to see you tonight!

Below are the full class descriptions. Please feel free to email me any questions you may have about the classes. Thank you for your interest in learning more about the body so you can have more fun with it!

Using All the Senses in Play, co-taught with Jim Duvall - TONIGHT 7/21 at the CSPC! Doors open at 6:30pm, 7pm start.

Paradise Unbound 2011 - August 9th through 14th. I'll be teaching Triage for Pick-up Play with Jim on Wednesday the 10th, 3-4:30pm and Floating Bliss for Partners on Thursday the 11th, 1-2:30pm.

Graydancer's Ropetastic Unconference Extravaganza - Agust 19th - 21st. I'll be organizing this event and since attendance means that you are participating in knowledge sharing, I am counting this as a teaching event for me. I have some ideas about analyzing/assessing/adapting physical limitations that don't work well as classes, but will probably work great in an open space situation like an un-conference.

Libido Events in Vancouver, BC on August 27th will host 2 classes Anatomy for Impact Play and Anatomy for Edge Play with the Head & Neck. Details such as times are still to be determined.

Using the Senses in Play with Sophia Sky & Jim Duvall
CSPC, in the Annex. 1608 15th Ave. W. Seattle, WA 98119
Cost: $20. per person
Time: 7:00-9:00pm (Doors open at 6:30pm)

Sensation play is often thought of as gentle or introductory play with blindfolds and bunny floggers. Utilizing all 5 senses can enhance any type, level or intensity of play and gives a richer texture to any scene. Knowing the anatomy and physiology of all the structures associated with touch, taste, smell, sight and sound will give you an advantage when selecting which senses to down play or sharpen in keeping with the goal of your scene. From setting the space through after care, tops & bottoms will learn via demos, lecture and exploration numerous ways to increase the depth of their play by manipulating sensory input.

Graydancer's Ropetastic Unconference Extravaganza
A GRUE is an un-conference - a gathering that is participant driven and self-organizing. Rather than impose an outside agenda on the attendees, the schedule is generated through a fast-moving group exercise facilitated by Gray. The group creates a day filled with a variety of subjects, some of which deal with rope and some of which stretch far beyond. Gender theory? Power dynamics? Scene design? STD awareness? Kinky spirituality? Cyber-security for perverts? All of these topics and many more have been covered in past GRUEs.
The one thing that every topic has in common - whether presentations, discussions, hands-on skillshares or laughing explorations into new territory- is passion. Everything that happens at a GRUE is something that an attendee is passionate about. The day is filled with energy, open exploration, unexpected connections, realizations, and discoveries. Like a structured contact improv dance, working within a proven framework every GRUE is different, beautiful, and unique to the needs and abilities of the people there.
Learn more at the GRUE site.
Be prepared to be surprised. As over two dozen other GRUEs in the U.S. and Canada have proven, the unconference and kink go hand in hand to create something amazing.
The Seattle GRUE will be donating a portion of the profits of this event to the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom and another portion to support independent sex-positive community educators.

Cost: $80 in advance ( http://center.ticketleap.com/grue/ ) or $95 at the door
Schedule:
Friday August 19th, 7-10pm or so: Meet-and-Greet. Location TBA
Saturday August 20th: 9:30am - 6pm GRUE! at the CSPC, Main Space. (Doors open at 8:30am and close promptly at 10am. Lunch is provided on site.)
Saturday Night, 9pm-2am: 2 Play Parties at CSPC, included in GRUE price. (Non-members must fill out consent forms.)
Sunday Morning: 10am-whenever: GRUE pancake brunch at the CSPC, Annex.

Triage for Pick-up Play
Or, how to negotiate & have a successful scene withsomeone you just met. We will teach you negotiation shortcuts to get you outinto the play space faster; how to pick up on body language cues; and physicalassessment skills to determine the right scene for 2 strangers to engage in.Basic communication skills will be demonstrated and practiced. Please comeprepared to participate in verbal class exercises with strangers.

Floating Bliss for Partners
Learn how to float your partner(s) into bliss! Being held is a powerful act for all involvedthat fosters connection, emotional catharsis and relaxation. This techniquesincorporates full body skin contact, slow movements and gentle stretching torelax, comfort and bring serenity to your partner and yourself. Learn how tocultivate connection through breathwork and body positioning in an aquaticenvironment. We will be in the warm pool for the majority of the time. Noswimming skills are necessary to be floated. Nudity is encouraged. Due to fullbody contact, I suggest you attend this class with someone you are familiarwith or someone you are comfortable being held by.

The Anatomyof Impact Play
Or, “How to whack on every possible surface of the humanbody without ending up in the ER.” As a massage therapist and anatomy geek, Sophia will share her knowledge of the human bodyand all the various types of impact it is capable ofwithstanding.
In thisclass, we will cover:
-the basicsof human anatomy
-theinflammatory process
-how variousbody parts respond to impact
-what can behit, and what should be avoided
-how to judgehow hard you can hit any particular area
-demonstrationswith various implements and toys

Please comeprepared to engage in discussion, participate in demos and don’t forget tobring your questions. Intended for tops, switches and bottoms of all skilllevels, genders and orientations.

Anatomyfor Edge Play with the Head and Neck
Our faces and throats are usually the first part of our bodythat we try to protect. Edgier forms of play such as face slapping and chokinggain much of their charge from the psychological aspect of man-handling such adelicate part of the body. Understanding the nature and location of theintricate structures of the head and neck can make your play more enjoyable,whether you are pulling hair or doing breath play. The knowledge of where these structure areand how to find them will inform your skills so that you can more effectivelyand safely engage in these activities.

This class will include lecture and demos that incorporateparticipation with plenty of time to get your anatomy questions answered.
Wear clothing with a loose neckline.

A great event for Queer Youth

2011-07-20T10:11:00.000-07:00

Born This Way Kafé
Fridays 5 to 9 p.m.
ALL Queer Youth

Ages 13 - 19
Free!

Born This Way Kafé: a welcoming place where GLBTQ youth + Friends + Allies can gather, be themselves, and have fun.

Cal Anderson Park Shelterhouse
1635 Eleventh Avenue on Capitol Hill
Just east of Pine and Broadway
Metro Routes 9, 10, 11, 12, 43, 49, 60, 84

4 info or 2 help make it happen:
Randy @ Seattle Parks
206.883.6110 txt/phn
randy.wiger@seattle.gov
Google "SeattleParksCOD" for Facebook

a POWER of PLACE (tm) program
Seattle Parks and Recreation
Shelterhouse occupancy capacity: 44

Reducing the Risk of Brain Damage During Faceslapping

2011-07-18T21:58:00.000-07:00

In my recent class on the "Anatomy of Impact Play" someone asked how one could minimize the possibility of sloshing someone's brains around in their head's via slapping the face. I said there really wasn't and there was some back and forth about supporting the head/neck vs. no or little support and how that affected the amount of sloshing inside the head.

After talking with a few people with experience with mild brain injuries, I learned that the more stable the head, the less sloshing of the brain upon impact, then the less that delicate grey matter gets banged up. The amount of force transmitted through the head when the head/neck are firmly supported is much less than the force on the brain banging against the inside of the skull from the head whipping around and stopping fast.

End result: firmly supporting the head and neck not only decreases the possibility of injury to the jaw and neck during face-slapping, it also decreases the trauma to the brain.

There is still risk of damage, mind you. Have fun and be as safe as you can.

Next Class is July 21st!

2011-07-12T08:33:00.000-07:00

Using the Senses in Play - Sophia Sky & Jim Duvall

Location: CSPC,in the Annex

Cost: $20

Time: 7pm - 9pm (doors open at 6:30pm)

FSPC Workshop - CSPC discounts do not apply

Non-members welcome.

Sensation play is often thought of as gentle or introductoryplay with blindfolds and bunny floggers. Utilizing all 5 senses can enhance anytype, level or intensity of play and gives a richer texture to any scene.Knowing the anatomy and physiology of all the structures associated with touch,taste, smell, sight and sound will give you an advantage when selecting whichsenses to down play or sharpen in keeping with the goal of your scene. From setting the space through after care,tops & bottoms will learn via demos, lecture and exploration numerous waysto increase the depth of their play by manipulating sensory input.

So, I really like this class. I love teaching with Jim, it’sa whole lot of fun blending our strengths. Add in the geekery possible withthis subject and the amount of fun and fascinating information is staggering!Aside from all the anatomy and physiological goodness, this class focuses onsetting, maintaining, propelling and concluding a scene. An experience thatengages all of our special senses is often more powerful in the moment and as amemory. We will make small forays into conditioning responses and manipulatingmood, of the space and the people within it.

This class is intended for all skill levels and playinterests of tops and bottoms and most of all, those not into any powerexchange. If you have any questionsabout the class, please feel free to email me or message me on FetLife.

Here is the link to theFetLife Event page so you can see who is going and let me know you aregoing.

Graydancer's Ropetastic Unconference Extravaganza Comes to the Suspension Capital of the World!

2011-07-10T12:38:00.000-07:00

Seattle GRUE

	Friday, August 19, 2011 06:00 PM
	Sunday, August 21, 2011 01:00 PM
	Center for Sex Positive Culture

Tickets -	$80 per person

A GRUE is an un-conference - a gathering that is participant driven and self-organizing. Rather than impose an outside agenda on the attendees, the schedule is generated through a fast-moving group exercise facilitated by Gray. The group creates a day filled with a variety of subjects, some of which deal with rope and some of which stretch far beyond. Gender theory? Power dynamics? Scene design? STD awareness? Kinky spirituality? Cyber-security for perverts? All of these and many more have been covered in past GRUEs.
The one thing that every topic has in common - whether presentations, discussions, hands-on skillshares or laughing explorations into new territory- is passion. Everything that happens at a GRUE is something that an attendee is passionate about. The day is filled with energy, open exploration, unexpected connections, realizations, and discoveries. Like a structured contact improv dance, working within a proven framework every GRUE is different, beautiful, and unique to the needs and abilities of the people there.

Be prepared to be surprised. As over two dozen other GRUEs in the U.S. and Canada have proven, the unconference and kink go hand in hand to create something amazing.

The Seattle GRUE will be donating a portion of the profits of this event to the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom and another portion to support independent sex-positive community educators.

Schedule:
Friday August 19th, 7-10pm or so: Meet-and-Greet. Location TBA
Saturday August 20th, 9:30am-6pm: GRUE! at the CSPC, Main Space.( Lunch is provided on site.)
Saturday Night, 9pm-2am: 2 Play Parties at CSPC, included in GRUE price. (Non-members must fill out consent forms.)
Sunday Morning: 10am-whenever: GRUE pancake brunch at the CSPC, Annex.
Register here: http://center.ticketleap.com/grue

Crashed

2011-07-09T09:46:00.000-07:00

So I stopped writing in here for a while due to not having much to say beyond my 140 character tweets. So much going on in my life right now is privately tumultuous. Add all that on top of needing to recover from the Seattle Erotic Art Festival, too.

I'm starting to come out of the depths.

"For consent to count...ASSENT has to matter."

2011-07-07T08:39:00.000-07:00

I am not generally of a mind to re-publish the writing of another person in this journal. However, I recently read an essay on FetLife that made me say, "Yes, that is what I have been trying to say for years!"

Below is a FetLife Journal Entry by SherynB titled Assent Matters, posted July 6th, 2011. All emphasis are by SherynB, copied exactly from her journal entry. She has given me permission to repost this and encourages reposting with attribution and a link back to the original post. Please respect her copyright and wishes if you would like to republish this essay.

Assent Matters by SherynB
Okay, there's a 600lb gorilla in the room, and I'm done pretending it's not there. What we do isn't pretty or politically correct, and frankly, it's dangerous if we can't get (and stay) honest about the reality of it. So here it is as raw and real and un-PC as it is:

There is a cult of victimhood building in the scene. It's being cultivated and nurtured in the name of something I don't believe the originators ever intended their catchy phrase to stand for. Its endgame is dangerous for everybody involved, physically, emotionally, socially, and legally...and it's going to harm us all if it isn't nipped in the bud, right fucking now.
For consent to count...ASSENT has to matter.
What we do is VOLUNTARY. It's not assault, battery or rape in any moral sense of the word, regardless of what the laws that were meant to protect people against involuntary harm actually say. We have message boards, clubs, businesses, parties and social groups where people come and ask, sometimes beg and plead, for others to hit, kick, scratch, burn, shock, bleed, humiliate, degrade, subjugate, frighten, outrage, piss on, piss off, and/or make them cry. Not because they are helpless victims, but because it sexually gratifies them to participate in those things. And there are people who agree to do it...want to do it...love to do all of those Terrible Horrible Very Nasty Things. Not because they are predatory assholes, but because it sexually gratifies them, too. And every one of those reputable organizations, and the ones that exist to protect them, insist on two things above all others: You must be an adult. You must be consenting.

And that applies to BOTH (or all) of you, dammit.

We can pretend whatever we want to in the confines of that emotional, theatrical, energetic bubble that is our "scene", whether it's for an hour or most of our 24/7 life. But the reality of the situation is that we are free, sentient, competent adults with a responsibility to take care of OURSELVES. If you're not, get out of the pool. Go home. You're not old enough or competent enough to play here. The roller coaster might look like fun, and it is, but if you aren't tall enough to ride this ride, nobody wants you on it...because when you fall out and get harmed, it not only hurts you, it closes down the ride for the rest of us.

I've been following an epic thread on consent for months now, watching sadly as many of the comments devolve into dangerously magical thinking and wishing somebody would speak up, and say "Whoa. There's a point at which personal responsibility comes into play here." It took far too long. I waited longer than I should have. I said nothing at first because I respected the poster. Then because it was Sexual Assault Awareness month. Then because I was busy. And finally realized, I just didn't really want to be the lightening rod for the reflexive push-back that would follow, when I called bullshit on the parts of it that were batshit Pollyanna craziness. But hey, there's more than one way people can get hurt in this game, and somebody has to stand up. I've been on both sides of this ride, and I'm out of patience with the silence, so today, it's me:

Being a top in this game is dangerous. Publicly, privately, with new partners or old. Being the one who does the Terrible Horrible Very Bad Things puts you in an untenable position that you cannot defend legally or morally no matter how many times they asked you to do it. As soon as somebody says "Oh, I changed my mind, I didn't want that after all," you are the one facing accusations of rape, boundary violations, incompetence, or predatory behavior. And it doesn't matter how careful you were, or how ethical you were, or how well you think you negotiated. You stay in this game for more than a couple years, you're gonna live through it whether you want to or not. Ask the biggest, baddest, kindest, most skilled, reputable and ethical tops of either gender that you know. Every single one of them has a story. Or two or three.

There are predators and crazies of all genders and every BDSM persuasion in this game. And yes, those poor tender delicate flowers of submission, slavery and painsluttery are more often than anybody talks about...dangerous, and occasionally, actually predatory. Some are crazy. Some are just uneducated or immature. But the thing the dangerous ones have in common sounds a lot like this:

"I didn't tell you, and you didn't know, and I didn't say anything while it was happening, but what you did I didn't want, and you should have known that, even though I was saying you could, because well...it's your responsibility to know better than I do what I want. And besides...I was in subspace/headspace/dissociated/whatever the fuck...and wasn't in my right mind when I said you could. So...I didn't really consent to that."

I can't say this clearly enough:
If you go to a place when you play that makes you incompetent to give or revoke consent, you have a disability that makes you a danger to yourself and to the people you play with. And if you're going to play this game AT ALL, you have a responsibility to choose your partners VERY carefully, disclose that problem UP FRONT, and negotiate truthfully, intelligently and with major self-awareness around it.
Because I've got news for those of you that think that "bottoms" can't do or consent to this or that or the other inside of a scene...a whole fucking bunch of us can. And do. And those of you that can't or won't, and still ask for pick-up play with people you barely know, are the worst nightmare of every top on the planet. Especially if your version of negotiation sounds a lot like "oh, um...you're hot...and I've heard good things about you...and oh, um...you know...whatever you want to do, I guess. I like [whatever it is that you do]."

Whether or not you want to live in that fantasy for yourself...or yell at me for calling you on it...keep this in mind: If you sell the notion that bottoming takes everybody to a place where consent is impossible...then ALL the work being done to make what we do legal and defensible and give us CHOICE is for naught. If we aren't competent to consent or withdraw consent once play starts, then everything we do will always be criminal, for our own protection. You can't have it both ways.

I know a couple that speak, teach and demonstrate some of the heaviest fear, humiliation & taboo play out there...they play deep in emotion all the time...and every time I've heard them speak or seen anything they've written for the last several years, I hear the bottom in that couple pleading for people to hear and understand: TOPS ARE NOT MINDREADERS. Her husband nods. But she's so frustrated you can almost hear her scream. It's a cry in the darkness I hear over and over, from tops, and from their partners, of either persuasion, and a whole bunch of bottoms who gag at being lumped in that "helpless subbie victim" category. Most of us are good with body language, with nuances of energy and emotion...some aren't. But NONE of us are mind-readers. And when you tell us things are good, when you ask for what you want, when you use words that are understandable and in plain English, and then tell us later that's not what you MEANT and we were supposed to KNOW that...we are helpless to respond. Because it's NOT RATIONAL.

Physical and emotional landmines happen. Endorphins and adrenaline allow things that the rational mind isn't comfortable with. We ALL wake up the next day sometimes thinking "What the FUCK was I thinking when I did/allowed/asked for that??" Or with more marks or bruises or embarrassment or physical or emotional hurt than we wanted, for ourselves or our partners. Sometimes it takes months to untangle whatever knots we surfaced. Sometimes we trigger stuff that needs therapy, or even medical treatment. Sometimes we do it on purpose, sometimes we don't. Shit happens, and often it's nobody's fault...unless you knew that shit was there, and didn't disclose it.

But when you wake up the next day and think to yourself: "Wow. I'm not comfortable with how far that went." Ask yourself what you actually did or said. Ask your partner what you did or said. Ask bystanders what you did or said. And own your part in it. Because whatever you were thinking...if you actually held the conversation and all the responses entirely in your head...you can't hold someone else responsible for what you didn't say or do here on the planet where the rest of us are. And if you couldn't possibly have predicted the outcome, how rational is it for you to expect that your partner should have?

Safewords exist for a reason. Plain English exists for a reason. All those classes on negotiation exist for a reason. Read the book The Gift of Fear (Gavin de Becker) and learn not just what a real predator looks like...but where YOUR responsibility to recognize the obvious signs and protect yourself begins. Find your emotional power to recognize and say "no" to what you don't want BEFORE you get naked and tied up and give up your actual physical power to walk away to anybody. And if you find, after the fact, that you don't have a voice in that situation...get one. Therapy and education and finding your own power will serve you far better in this life than setting yourself up for perpetual victimhood again and again, and wondering why it keeps happening to YOU.

Because your consent DOES count. And when you give it...you have a responsibility to give it honestly, and to expect to be taken at your word. And when you withdraw it, which you have a perfect right to do at any time, you have responsibility to communicate it clearly, and to act on it. Anything else puts you and everybody you play with at risk. Once you've done THAT, there's no excuse and no apology for anybody violating it. But until you do...it's magical and dangerous thinking to believe that someone else is going to "know" what you want, and do it, despite what you say or don't say. In fact, somebody who would discount your communication that way, is far more dangerous than someone who takes you at your word, as a competent, sentient adult, who has decided for yourself that you're big enough to be on this strange and wonderful ride.

Now somebody get that gorilla a banana. We've been ignoring it for far too long.

Naked Truth

2011-05-11T15:38:00.001-07:00

Remember when I wrote about doing the photo shoot for the Naked Truth installation that will be featured at the Seattle Erotic Art Festival?

The photographer, Jim Wilkinson, has put up a teaser on his blog that includes me and the ever lovely, Allena.

Memory Lane

2011-04-26T01:25:00.000-07:00

I found a bunch of old CDs of music from my childhood and added them to my itunes. That got me thinking about what a big role music played in my formative years. I really do believe that music is food for the soul. It stirs the emotions and inspires our bodies to movement. Music communicates so purely. When words would just mess something up, you can trust music to carry the message.

Growing up, there was always music playing in our house. All kinds and styles of music. My Nana had been a concert pianist as a young woman in England before World War II. She would always accede to my requests for ragtime style songs. I think I liked the stories of her stealing the sheet music from her older sisters after her father decreed she was too young to listen to/play think kind of music more than the songs themselves.

My mama would dance around while folding laundry or sing in the car. Simon & Garfunkle, Fleetwood Mac, all the songs from "The Sound of Music" and the Eagles were her favourites. She and I were good at quickly memorizing lyrics and often sang a Capella. We didn't need no stinking radio to sing along with!

My father had bizarre, eclectic tastes. I remember once being in the record store waiting for what seemed like forever while he choose which Beethoven recording he wanted to buy along with the newest AC/DC album. He would buy a whole album for one song and not complain at all that the other songs weren't to his liking. Where my mama put on a record and listened to the whole thing, he played DJ, often sprinting across the room at the tail end of a song so he would pick up the needle and jump to another track on the record.

What a trail of memories listening to "Soul of the Sea" by Heart started.

Being a part of art.

2011-04-16T09:59:00.000-07:00

One of my greatest joys is helping an artist bring their vision to life. I, and the five other models in the Newton's Cradle, got the sweetest email from the artist, Jim Duvall.

I just wanted to thank you all for being a part of a great piece of art. and let you know some of the reception it has gotten so far.

It has already been awarded the. following accolades, Deviant Art Daily Deviation. If you are not a member you will not see the image but you can read the comments. There are over 400. The fun ones are when we all get called Nazis 2-3 pages down. It is already ranked in the top 150 fetish images of all time there in only a week.

Model Mayhem Picture of the day.

Model insider Picture of the day.

Besides getting a enormous amount of comments on FetLife.

So a very heartfelt thank you to you all. I could not have done this without you.

You can see this piece of art, and purchase it at the Seattle Erotic Art Festival May 20th through 22nd.

Pssst! If you love art, you can volunteer to be an Art Guide and share knowledge about the various art that was juried and invited into the exhibition.

Call for Volunteers, and Big Volunteer Meeting 4/23!

2011-04-13T16:55:00.000-07:00

Want to join the fun of putting on Seattle's sexiest event? Volunteer for the Seattle Erotic Art Festival! We have lots of volunteer opportunities, so peruse the list and write volunteer@seattleerotic.org to find the right job for you.

We especially need help distributing postcards, and need assistance with our stage crew (are you a Technical Director or a builder who can help with sets? A board/spotlight operator? We need stage hands, production assistants and more!)

If you aren't quite sure what you want to do, join us on Saturday, April 23 for the Big Volunteer Meeting. This is an important meeting for all volunteers, and a great chance for those of you who want to learn more and get involved.

Please spread the word and recruit your friends!

...After the Festival.

2011-04-11T17:27:00.000-07:00

Now is the time of year when that is the most common thing I say. Usually that is uttered after something I would dearly love to do, such as have dinner with friends, go out of town or any other number of things that will just have to wait until after the Festival is over.

One thing I have decided not to put off until after the Festival is teaching. On Thursday the 21st I will be teaching my Palpation for Rope Play class in the Annex of the Center for Sex Positive Culture. Doors will open at 7pm and the class will start at 7:30 and go until 9:30pm. The class is $20.

I'll post more about the class when I have just a little more time. :-)

How was your last Saturday night?

2011-04-05T17:47:00.001-07:00

Thank You for Attending the

Red Hot Launch Party

Big thanks to all the sexy people who attended Saturday's Red Hot Launch Party. Nearly 1,000 of you joined us to celebrate. Check out the smokin' pictures! Oo la la!

Did you enjoy yourself? Please complete our brief survey and let us know what you thought. It's quick and easy, and we greatly appreciate your feedback.

Help us Launch the Seattle Erotic Art Festival!

2011-03-27T02:21:00.001-07:00

The Seattle Erotic Art Festival's RED HOT LAUNCH PARTY is just around the corner on Saturday, April 2. *Hundreds of tickets* have sold so far.
Are you joining the party?

Check out our top-notch DJs and sexy performers (and view some tantalizing pics!). Get excited about the awesome new venue with a big dance floor, two full cash bars and even a stripper pole.

Launch Party tickets are going fast, so get yours today and make sure you can attend!
$10 advance / $12 door
Full cash bar - 21+ only

Bring your friends, bring your date(s) -- you don't want to miss this!

My Naked Truth.

2011-03-24T13:49:00.001-07:00

Yesterday, I did a very potent shoot with Jim Wilkinson of Edmonds. He has been accepted as an installation artist for the Seattle Erotic Art Festival, being helped May 20^th-22^nd. His project is called "Naked Truth: Exposing Men's/Women's Souls." The idea is that even when we are without clothes, we are not necessarily vulnerable. There is always something about ourselves that if we wore it on our skin for everyone to see, then we would be truly naked and vulnerable. Here is a small snippet from his casting call:

I'm looking for women who will be able to be vulnerable and honest as I paint your "message" on your body and then photograph you. There's a place in this work to express yourself in these very powerful (and sometimes playful) images.

Sounds easy, right? And it was, during the shoot. There were definitely a few moments when the weight of the words seemed to drag me down. The various expressions I wore were real and poignant, but not overwhelming. Later that evening, though, the full extent of what I had revealed to him couldn't be ignored. Those words are a hard truth; a painful truth I have been avoiding.

"I'm angry my daddy isn't my father."

There are so many layers to that statement. And they all are sad and painful right now. And as much as it's not pleasant, it's ok that I am feeling these things. I am trying to approach this the way I look at the Energy Pull Ritual: It was extremely valuable. Even though it wasn't fun and I didn't get to the state of ecstasy that was the goal- it was incredibly valuable. Knowing that I am still working through this shit is valuable. Grief can't be worked through if you ignore it. So, here I go. Hugs and head pets are most appreciated, if you can spare them.

In closing, this is a great project and a fun artist to work with. If you are interested in being a part of this installation and being truly naked at the Festival, give Jim an email.

More than 140 characters?

2011-03-15T17:12:00.000-07:00

Good lord, it's been a while since I wrote anything longer than what I could fit on a Twitter message.

This week is all about getting ready for KinkFest this weekend. Lecture notes are being updated, multi-media presentations are being created and shenanigans are in negotiations! Jim and I are teaching three classes together this year, with two of them being brand new.

Triage for Pick-up Play - Friday 3pm-4:30pm

Or, how to negotiate & have a successful scene with someone you just met. We will teach you negotiation shortcuts to get you out into the play space faster; how to pick up on body language cues; and physical assessment skills to determine the right scene for 2 strangers to engage in. Basic communication skills will be demonstrated and practiced. Please come prepared to participate in verbal class exercises with strangers.

Bondage for Sadists and Masochists - Sunday 10am-11:30am

Pain is usually our bodies’ way of telling us something is wrong. It stimulates instinctual reactions to avoid, flee, recoil and get away. A lot of S/m play begins with a mastery of pain and how to manage it and let it become some juicy, delicious, endorphin producing elixir. This workshop will be an effort to find the right types of pain for your scene and how to produce that with rope. We will talk about pain to avoid and pain to languish and wallow in. Ties that can cause endurance or gradual pain and those that will strike immediately. Everyone should look forward to exploring their sadism and masochism in this class.

Physics & Body Mechanics for Suspension Bondage - Sunday 3pm-4:30pm

In this class, Jim & Sophia address and break down the necessary factors in the creation and execution of a successful suspension. We’ll look at basic body structure, focusing on using contours and strengths to an advantage while minimizing the stress placed on more fragile structures. We’ll show you how to work with gravity and use basic physics to get a body up into the air by working smarter, not harder, while minimizing physical harm to the bottom.

I'll also be assisting Jim in his Photography for Bondage" class, which is happening Saturday morning at 10am-11:30am. Go take a look at all the other workshops being offered, too. If you haven't signed up, and you want to go, today is the last day to register.

Now, I have to deal with the most important task of all: packing! Deciding what to wear and what to bring along to a conference is always somewhat painful. The prospect of needing or wanting something that was left at home is quite undesirable. The tiara is coming, as well as the One Wilde Knight corset. Other than those, it's always so hard to know what I'll want to wear in advance.

Thank you!

2011-02-01T18:21:00.000-08:00

I am incredibly grateful to every artist who took the time to submit their art to the jury for a chance to be a part of the visual art exhibition!

Now we will be heads-down working on getting everything ready for the jury and going through the selection process. We should be done by March 8th and will let everyone know the results then. Please be patient with us.

There are still other calls for art open for Literary & Film exhibitions, not to mention Installations are wanted, so tell your friends to get on that.

This first deadline indicates my withdrawal from anything not Festival related. This year I am going to do my best to still do things not art related. I may need people to invite me to events, though, so I remember that there is more to life than the Festival.

Here we go! Wheeeeee!

Seattle Erotic Art Festival Call open 'til midnight!

2011-01-31T10:42:00.001-08:00

There's still time! Call for Visual Art closes tonight at midnight PST

There's still time to submit your visual art for the 2011 Festival! But don't delay, the call is closing tonight (Monday, January 31). You have until midnight PST to submit.

All artists 18+ are encouraged to submit up to five works of erotic art of any medium. Sculptors, multimedia artists and painters are particularly encouraged to apply.

Selected art will be showcased throughout the three-day event to thousands of patrons. The Festival sells more art than any other erotic art festival, and stands by its mission to support living artists with low submission fees and competitive commission rates. All exhibiting and invited artists are also invited to sell work in the popular Festival Store.

Modeling opportunity

2011-01-27T19:45:00.001-08:00

I lovely man with whom I have shot with before, Ricardo Scipio, is planning another book focusing on portraying the goddess in every woman. He is an absolute joy to work with; easy going, intelligent conversationalist and kind man are who I would describe him. Professional experience is definitely not required to be a part of this project. What is important is authenticity and the willingness to let your soul shine through. He mentioned that he is particularly interested in working with women of colour.

The official casting call:

Goddesses wanted for Photography Book. I'm working on my third book of tasteful fine art nudes. You can be any age, race and body type. Must be willing to be tastefully photographed nude. Please reply with a recent photograph of your face. Examples of my work and newspaper reviews will be provided. Serious inquiries only, please.

(and ...pass the word on please)... nycfilmcanada@aol.com

Shoulder strengthening goodness!

2011-01-22T17:14:00.000-08:00

Bondage practitioners, listen up! This workshop targets the muscles & joints that aerialists often injure, which happens to correspond with the same structures in bondage bottoms and even tops, too. I attended this same class last year and found the instructor to be very knowledgeable, approachable with questions and enthusiastic. Highly recommended!

Workshop: "Shoulders for the Aerialist"
Time: Thursday January 27th, at 7:45pm-9:15pm
Place: downstairs studio at Versatile Arts
Cost: $20, theraband loops will be for sale only $7

Michele Frances Benedisuk, owner of Vitality Physical Therapy has been a licensed physical therapist for over 10 years, and has worked with aerial arts for over 7. She will be offering a 90 minute shoulder workshop which will focus on biomechanics, anatomy, and essential daily conditioning exercises for the aerialist. The goal of this workshop is to improve the aspiring, or professional aerialist's understanding of shoulder injury prevention, postural alignment, form, rotator cuff protection, and active scapular stabilization. There will be an anatomy lecture with visual models and handouts, basic biomechanical/kinesiology regarding the glenohumeral andscapulothoracic joints will be discussed, as well strength and stretching exercise demonstration and practice. Home exercise sheets will also be provided. All levels of practice are encouraged to attend.

Theraband loops will be for sale of only $7. If you have your own (light to light/medium resistance) please bring it along.

*Wear layers as the downstairs space is chilly during the evening.

Please register in advance with Michele at michelefrances11@gmail.com

Early Bird fee ends on January 15th!

2011-01-12T00:45:00.000-08:00

Calling all artists!

The Seattle Erotic Art Festival is now accepting art submissions for the ninth annual event, to be held May 20-22, 2011 at Fremont Studios.

The Festival is seeking visual art of all media, short film/video, interactive installations and literary art. All artists 18+ are encouraged to submit art now at SeattleErotic.org.

The early-bird submission fee is only $20 if you submit by January 15, midnight PST. The fee includes a Friday ticket to the Festival ($30 value, non-transferable, non-refundable). Regular submission fee of $30 will be in effect from the 16th until the close of the call for art on the 31st.

Selected art will be professionally showcased throughout the three-day event to thousands of patrons. This is a fantastic opportunity!

Spread the word, and sign up for our free newsletter to receive updates.

How art saved my life.

2011-01-10T00:36:00.001-08:00

Many dear friends are involved with organizing and performing at Vita Arts current show. I wanted very much to be a part of this event and was quite sad to abstain as this is a subject near and dear to my heart. Art, especially music, if food for the soul. To be truly fulfilled in life, one has to have some amount of art buoying them up, providing challenge or inspiration. If you are looking for something to do this coming Saturday night, go checkout "How Art Saved My Life". I can guarantee that you willhear some amazing poetry and see some beautiful aerial work, among other acts.
~~~~~~~~

Photo by Chris Clark.

"How Art Saved My Life" takes place in a collective mind space. The show is an amplified illustration of the moment in time where you stare into a black hole and choose life. The setting is the mind, in dreamspace, fantasy, plugged into the matrix, whatever you want to think of it. The stories told are amplifications, illustrations, depictions, of that moment, when art saved "you", and the moments before and after it. The show flows in a liquid motion toward progress and self acceptance and is sure to move, inspire, and entertain.

This show is open to the public, and consists of the theatrical production presented in Vita Arts latest workshop as well as a variety of performances by Vitas staff, teachers and guest artists.

This show is for our friends, family, enthusiasts and supporters to come see what we are up to, enjoy a great show, and celebrate a new chapter in how Vita Arts changes peoples lives. Tickets are $12 advance from https://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/138852 and $15 at the door.

We're pulling out the stadium seating, so we have plenty of room – tell your friends and carpool!

January 15, 2011 7:00 PM
Youngstown Cultural Arts Center
4408 Delridge Way
Seattle, WA 98126

$12 ADVANCED AT BROWN PAPER TICKETS
$15 CASH ONLY at the door.

Calling all artists!

2011-01-04T20:59:00.000-08:00

Seattle Erotic Art Festival -- Now Accepting Submissions!

The Seattle Erotic Art Festival is now accepting art submissions during the month of January for the ninth annual event, to be held May 20-22, 2011 at Fremont Studios.

The Festival is seeking visual art of all media, short film/video, interactive installations and literary art. All artists 18+ are encouraged to submit art now at SeattleErotic.org.

The early-bird submission fee is only $20 if you submit by January 15, midnight PST. The fee includes a Friday ticket to the Festival ($30 value, non-transferable, non-refundable). After January 15th through the deadline of January 31st, the submission fee is $30.

Selected art will be professionally showcased throughout the three-day event to thousands of patrons. This is a fantastic opportunity!

Spread the word, and sign up for our free newsletter to receive updates.

Happy New Year

2011-01-01T10:09:00.000-08:00

David Jones is in the house!

Today I get the present of words spoken by my favourite poet and dear friend, David L. Jones. I am so excited that he has, along with many other former members of the Little Red Studio Poetry Posse, reading around town as part of the Floating Mountain Poets. He recently did an interview, his first as a poet of interest. Check it out at Poet Speaks Out!

One of the things we will talk about today is the possibility of working on a book that will collect works of words and pictures that I have inspired. I have to admit that embarrasses me. While I pride myself on having been a muse to many, I am not sure it is something to boast about. After all, it's more impressive tome when someone makes art. I am a facilitator as a model; I help artists bring their visions to life. In poetry, the one who inspires hasn't done any work.

Obviously, I am still trying to wrap my head around it. And my discomfort at being perceived as egotistical won't keep me from agreeing that it is a book that we could sell because it will have some amazing poetry and art in it. I will be arrogant in my boast that I join forces with very gifted artists, indeed.

I'll be sure to keep you posted.

Teaching at KinkFest 2011!

2010-12-28T07:37:00.000-08:00

I am pleased to be teaching with Jim Duvall at KinkFest next March 18th through the 20th. We have new classes to offer: "Physics & Body Mechanics for Suspension Bondage" and "Triage for Pick-up Play".

KinkFest is one of my favourite bdsm events.Not only is much of the dungeon equipment Sophie-Proof, but it's close enough to Seattle to be affordable to travel there and far enough away that it feels like a vacation.

Below is info about their Early Bird rates. The FetLife event listing.

Don’t miss KinkFest 2011’s Early Bird special, now until January 15th. Register today at www.KinkFest.org.
PLA & reciprocal members, now is your time to snag a KinkFest 2011 registration for $50 off normal price. Not a member? Join now at www.portlandleather.org.

New this year:
· NEW VENUE! The Oregon Convention Center is Portland's First-Class, state-of-the-art conference space, with convenient light rail access to the airport and to downtown restaurants, shopping, nightclubs, and more.

· NEW HOTEL! Exclusive weekend access to the conference hotel with welcoming, kink-friendly management and staff. Enjoy comfortable rooms, free wi-fi, fitness center, and access to KinkFest activities in the clothing-optional Skyview Lounge and Roof-Top Terrace with panoramic views of downtown Portland and the West Hills!

· NEW DUNGEON! Get full time access to our well-equipped, 18,000+ square foot dungeon during conference hours... then stick around for Kinkfest's infamous Friday and Saturday night play parties! The dungeon will feature fantastic displays, incredible rigging set-ups for those bondage and suspension enthusiasts, one of the biggest collection of dungeon furniture on the West coast, awesome lighting and sound system, live performances and a live DJ at both play parties, gear storage area and more!

· MORE WORKSHOPS! KinkFest has practically doubled the number of top-notch presenters for this year and has a diversified and expanded selection of educational workshops featuring a variety of topics from some of the nation's best presenters on all 3 days.

Renowned presenters from across the nation include:
· Mollena Williams, International Ms Leather 2010
· Laura Antoniou, author of The Marketplace series
· Cleo Dubois of Cleo Dubois Academy of SM Arts
· Fakir Musafar, co-developer of modern body piercing techniques
· Lee Harrington, author and human sexuality educator
· And many more…

Dialog of the Week.

2010-12-26T07:55:00.000-08:00

Him: Thanks for suspending me. That was quite a hoot.

Me: That was fun! I think I would prefer to stick with the resistance and wrestling scenes with you. You know, just introducing a little switchy energy rather than being the top. It didn't feel right topping you.

Him: Oh, don't worry. That won't happen very often.

Warm Winter Wishes

2010-12-24T13:50:00.000-08:00

What a day! And it's not even halfway done!

This morning, I went downtown and gave out Christmas care packages and food to "those less fortunate" with Santa, Allena, Drew from Ballard Brothers, and a few others. It was an interesting experience and quite powerful that a little bit of generosity goes a very long way in the world. We'll being doing it next year on Christmas Eve morning.If you want to join us, please let me know.

On the night of the solstice, Jim and I did a photo shoot for his holiday card. This is actually the product of two shoots. The plan was to do the shoot on a roof that had a fantastic view of the Space Needle. At the last minute, permission was withdrawn, due to the number of people electing to watch the lunar eclipse on the roof.

Plan B to the rescue in the form of Photoshop. Jim shot the view of the Needle and the moon and we relocated to another rooftop and shot me spinning fire. He was careful to take the photos of me so that I was in scale with the view he took photos of earlier so that the composition would be as true to life as possible. I am pretty pleased with the result. For as cold as I was, I am amazed that the image isn't blurry from my shivers!

Now, it's off to the thrift store to find a roasting pan so I can finish making apple butter. (Cross your fingers for me.) Then to make elk stroganoff for xmas dinner with my made family.

Whatever you choose to celebrate, may you and your loved ones enjoy wealth, health and happiness.

Give the gift of Velvet

2010-12-21T12:04:00.000-08:00

What would make for a more luxurious and sexy stocking stuffer than an indulgent weekend at the Seattle Erotic Art Festival?

The decadent Velvet Experience includes:

Exclusive first opportunity to preview and purchase art from the exhibition
Very limited sneak peek behind the scenes of the Festival on Thursday night
VIP parking each day
Express lane at all service areas (bar, Festival Store, and coat check)
Personalized docent tour
Unique gift bag, including a gift certificate to the Festival Store
Two full passes to the entire Festival -- two fabulous nights and three exciting days of art exhibition, performances, and dancing
Two full passes to the Festival Launch Party in April 2011*
And more!

Extremely limited availability.
Secure your experience today!

* The Launch party sold out last year. While we will be in a bigger venue in 2011, a Velvet Experience is a guarantee you will get in.

No, the other foot.

2010-12-13T15:59:00.001-08:00

Last night was the one year anniversary of the fetish dress code party, Strict Machine, held at the Mercury. Jim and I were among the first performers when the party got its start. Due to breaks ups, we hadn't performed there in a while. We were honoured to be invited to perform again.

The Mercury has quite the low ceiling; about 9 feet high. There was much back and forth as to whether we should do aerial bondage work there or just stick with suspension bondage. Either would be dynamic, but the aerial bondage is much more fun and interesting. The decision is made to go with the aerial antics with plenty of passionate interactions so as to lengthen the performance. If we do nothing but the aerial work, I am barely good for 5 minutes, as it is a strenuous activity.

We get off to a good start, despite Jim having to warn people that they will get kicked if they don't steer clear. That's to be expected when doing any kind of ambient performance, especially being located on the dance floor. Our energy and excitement builds through the interactions and the first gentle throw. In our usual manner of drastically ramping up, the second throw has more oomph and I pop upside down. My left foot smacks into the support beam that holds our hardpoint, which causes me to spin in the opposite direction. I finish the spin out and when he catches me, I whisper that I whacked my foot, that it's bad but pretty sure no broken bones. Continue? Oh, hell, yes! And off we go again.

As I start to get tired, I can feel the pain increasing. The worry sets in, and I signal the wrap up. He gets me down and I hobble off to check my foot. I barely get my boot off and immediately regret that I'll have to put it back on. The lateral side and top of my foot were quite puffy already. A hasty exit and soon I am home with an ice pack on my foot and a hot pack on my thigh. (This is a great trick to bring down inflammation very fast.)

I have been icing on and off all day, and therefore doing quite well. This injury doesn't even warrant a picture. Except for the extreme pain when trying to push in the clutch of a standard transmission car, I can get around mostly pain free. (I didn't even try on the motorcycle boot.) I figure my foot is bruised, though hopefully not the bones themselves. Bone bruises take forever to heal. At least it wasn't the right foot, like the last 4 foot/ankle injuries.

Good day talking about art.

2010-12-04T20:24:00.000-08:00

Today was the CSPC's vendor fair. I set up a booth on behalf of the Foundation and sold swag and art from past Seattle Erotic art Festivals.

I ended up talking to a fair number of artists about submitting their work in January. It's amazing how narrow a definition some people have about what is erotic art. One young man was telling me about how his ceramic sculptures were only suggestive if you looked at them from a certain angle. He seemed a bit surprised when I expressed interest, as if there isn't any copulation in the art, it must not be erotic. If a piece of art has anything to do with sensuality, one's own sexuality, society's notions/attitudes around sex and sexuality or any of the emotional or spiritual ramifications of being a sexual being, then it's erotic art.

Any art that is erotically charged is erotic art. And that definition is highly subjective. (Which is the main reason why the Festival jury is different every year.) When a piece of art captures your interest and increases your vitality in any way, not just sexually, it is full of eros. The book The Gift: Imagination and the Erotic Life of Property (alternately with the subtitle: Creativity an the Artist in the Modern World) explores this idea that erotic energy is a life force energy that can be channeled into artistic endeavours.

If you are someone who creates art that is sexy or is inspired by your or other's sexuality, please consider submitting your art this January to the 2011 Seattle Erotic Art Festival.

A Must-Go show from the Jet City Improv peeps.

2010-11-25T11:12:00.000-08:00

I am hoping to go Wing-I Productions' annual holiday show, Uncle Mike Ruin's Christmas after missing it last year. I missed out on this run of improv hilarity and nastiness and was subjected to the "pooping out baby jesus" jokes that lasted weeks. And knowing this group, I am sure they would have been funny to me if I had seen the performance.

My dear friend Chris, an improv muscian, sent me this as a way of inticing me to attend:

This past Saturday was so over the top that the entire cast mimed masturbation as their final goodnight. I'm so proud.

I don't know whether to be impressed with his perverse sense of pride or annoyed that he knows I am a sucker for anything having to do with masturbation. That said, I adore it when Jet City does an unscripted play. I thoroughly enjoyed "Lease" in 2008. The actor games that make up the run of the mill improv shows do nothing for me. Being witty is nice and all, but my attention span is a bit longer than a gnat's. But making the actors string it out into a fully fleshed-out and fucked up one hour length play? Now we're talking talent.

Oh, and Happy Thanksgiving! Remember to thank your loved ones for being in your life. They don't have to love you and the fact that they do is worthy of your gratitude.

Snow.

2010-11-23T23:38:00.000-08:00

I promised myself that I wouldn't complain about how bad the winter was this year. Seattle had such an incredible autumn. The sun-filled afternoons that followed those often foggy mornings afforded me more sunbathing opportunities than most other years.

And I will keep that promise. I will not complain about the hard winter. I will complain about other things like scary drivers in the snow and how wrong it is that snow blew INTO my car through all the little crevices. There was SNOW INSIDE my car this morning. The Mean Man said that made perfect sense with how hard the wind was blowing last night. He went on to tell me how that was just like home, as in where he grew up in the Great White North.

Snow got inside my car and there were no windows open in the slightest.

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot!?

I want you to make sexy art!

2010-11-22T12:17:00.000-08:00

Call for Art!

Artists, get your creative engines turning!
The Festival will be accepting submissions January 1-31, 2011, for the ninth annual event.

All artists age 18+ are encouraged to submit up to five (5) works of erotic art of any medium. Sculptors, multimedia artists and painters are particularly encouraged to apply. Submissions can be made online at SeattleErotic.org, throughout January.

The Festival is a jury-selected, erotic fine art exhibition and arts festival. A place where art that is rarely seen in mainstream galleries and museums can be celebrated, discussed and supported. An event where clichés of "sexiness" can be replaced with intriguing explorations of eroticism.

A different and new Festival jury is appointed every year, with careful consideration. To increase diversity of the selected art, the jury consists of an erotic artist, an art professional, an art collector, a sex positive activist, and a Festival committee member. Art is selected by a blind jury; jurors never know whose work they are reviewing during the process. Unknown and famous artists alike are given equal consideration and opportunity.

In order to show the work of successful and international artists who no longer choose to submit their work to juried shows, the Festival does include curated and invited artist sections as well, but the juried work has always represented the majority of art showcased at the Festival.

We stand by our mission to support a vibrant creative community, supporting living artists with low submission fees and commission rates. Selected art will be showcased throughout the three-day event to thousands of patrons. The Festival sells far more art than any other erotic art festival.

Artists may also choose to submit to the Festival Store, which has a later submission deadline (to be determined). Artists do not need to attend the Festival in order to participate.
Spread the word, and sign up for our newsletter to receive updates.

Do you love the Seattle Erotic Art Festival?

2010-11-19T10:44:00.000-08:00

Hard at work.

We're already sketching exciting plans for 2011, crafting a fresh new event that will satisfy and surprise.

Join us! Give $25 and be a part of making this sexy event happen. Even $5 helps bring the Festival to life, so please give now, and spread the word to your friends. With your support we can take the Festival to new levels.

Let's create an amazing event together.

Donate!

*The Foundation for Sex Positive Culture, producer of the Festival, is tax exempt under Section 501(c)(3) of the Internal Revenue Code, and gifts are **tax deductible** under Section 170(b)(1)(A)(vi) of the Code.*

2010-11-15T22:16:00.000-08:00

I'd like to invite you to a fundraiser for the Center and Foundation for Sex Positive Culture, Thursday, November 18th at 7:00pm, at the Little Red Studio in Seattle. There will be enticing auction items, give-a-ways, and other fun and frivolity. Tickets are available at TicketLeap. You can also see the growing list of auction items on the Center's website.

Flagging

2010-11-14T20:15:00.000-08:00

In gay, leather & SM communities, coloured hankies are used as a signaling code for finding partners to engage in sexual activities. (Yes, I am including SM in the umbrella of sexual.)

I flag grey left to signify I am a bondage top. There are a lot of other things I am into and tying people up isn't even the activity I do most often. However, it is a part of me that is central to my sexual identity. When my car was prowled 2 years ago and my rope bag was stolen, my initial reaction was that my sexuality had been stolen. "How will I ever come again?" Reason swiftly told me that was a bit more dramatic than the situation called for, and I was left with having to mourn all the firsts that I lost along with that bag. That experience taught me that this was a large part of my identity even though I bottom in my primary relationship.

Now, for Xmas last year, I did get a green hankie in my stocking, so I will occasionally put that hankie in my right pocket to signify I have a daddy. Occasionally,I will flag both grey and green. I think 2 hankies is plenty at one time, and may even be a bit too much advertising. Boiling your interests/identity down to one or two is not reductionism: it's focusing what you are advertising. Having more than 2 hankies in your drawer is fine; choosing the corresponding hankie to wear for the planned activities for a date or a play party is a great way to get into a specific head space. Wearing 3 or 4 hankies at one time may lead people to believe you are greedy or undecided. If you don't mind those perceptions arising in others, then, go for it.

I do know someone who has a hankie with 4 different coloured corners and he folds it so that all for corners stick out of his back pocket. I find that charming, if perhaps an overly specific partner/play request that may keep him from hooking up with fabulous people who may not be into all four of those things. I also think it looks much more tasteful than having the bulk and riotous colour that results from having multiple hankies hanging out your pocket.

When choosing which hankie you plan to flag with, decide whether you are flagging your identity or your preferences to attract partners. If I identify as a bondage top, but I am going to a play party looking to get tied up, I will be sure to have that grey hankie hanging out of my right pocket. Generally, I flag my identity rather than what I may be searching for in the realm of play or relationships. I fold the hankie so that two or so inches peek out of my back pocket. When I am on the prowl for play, I will fold the hankie fewer times so that a good portion hangs down out of my pocket in an effort to get more people to notice what my role in play is.

Be aware, the big, long "hanky code" list that can be found online started as an April Fool's Day joke. Historically, the hankie code was a smaller number of coulours and what the colours meant varied from region to region. Take it with a grain of salt and have fun with it.

Coming out.

2010-11-11T13:21:00.000-08:00

I am convinced to be a happy and whole person, one must embrace their sexuality. Most of my daily life is spent inside the "love bubble", that wondrous place where all your friends are sex positive and accepting of all your kinks. I am contemplating coming all the way out of the closet.

What keeps me from doing that? Having to say this: "Hey Gramma, you know those anatomy classes I teach? Well, I'm teaching people how to tie each other up and hit each other in a more effectively & safely."

I don't think that's going to go over well.

Vote!

2010-10-30T21:13:00.000-07:00

I take voting very seriously. As a citizen of a country that has a democratic government system, I believe it is a responsibility as well as a right to participate by voting. One of my parents was a British subject; hence, no voting for him. I have no memories of elections being a big deal in our household, or hearing my parents talk about who they were going to vote for during my childhood. Maybe that is why I was so curious about the process and hungry to take my place at the polls.

When I was 17 and a half, I set out to learn about politics in preparation for voting, as the month after I turned 18 was a presidential election. I found a tape called I Blow Minds for a Living with Jello Biafra's ranting about monkey wrenching the system while at the same time fulfilling one's civic duty by voting. After listening to him, I decided to register as a independent rather than proclaim a political party. I became diligent about researching candidates, initiatives and propositions so that I could make an informed decision based on my ethics and ideals.

I loved pouring over my voter's pamphlet, making notes of my opinions, crossing things out and circling other things so that when I went to the polls I was prepared. This was a sacred rite in which I eagerly participated. Going to the polling station was truly satisfying; especially when it was located in a school. For some reason, voting in a church was much less satisfying. I guess I take the concept of separating church and state too literally.

I understand the reasons for having a mail in system, but I do miss going to the polls. Last year, I saved voting for the first Tuesday in November; taking my ballot to the drop off station rather than mailing it in. I was doing my best to maintain that polling ritual. This year, I am accepting the fact that I will be mailing in my ballot. I have been reading my pamphlet and searching on the interweb in between working, marking my votes as I go. Voting while all bundled up in bed is quite nice. I think this soften the disappointment of not going to the polls.

Remember to get your ballots in the mail or to a drop off point by Tuesday November 2nd. Enjoy your responsibility!

Fire Connection

2010-10-25T10:28:00.000-07:00

I started spinning staff again. Practicing to polish my skills and pushing myself farther. Making new contacts in the fire community where I can and envisioning where I want to go with this activity. I want to make art. I want to perform with fire again.

YouTube is great for generating ideas and finding heroes. Contact work has captured my attention and this video gave me a goal to work toward:

Endorsement of the week.

2010-10-21T10:35:00.000-07:00

Fact: I have long curly hair. And finding someone who can give a haircut that still looks good a month later, or even the next week, is difficult.

About six years ago, my beloved "hair artist" left Seattle for Chicago. Since then, I have suffered through some less than stellar haircuts. One day in desperation, I cut my own hairs in a spring time ritual. After the lack of dire results, and because I didn't have anyone who would take me to task for doing it myself, it became a yearly tradition.

And then I met Eric, the master of long curly hair. After the 4th friend recommended that I go to the Robert Leonard Salon and ask for Eric, I figured I should. I am immensely pleased with the results. A month later, I shake out my hair from a ponytail or when I crawl out of bed and it still looks fabulous!

A fan-tastic weekend!

2010-10-19T09:34:00.000-07:00

This weekend, the Foundation for Sex Positive Culture is hosting two authors I greatly admire.

Deborah Sundahl wrote Female Ejaculation and the G-spot which is an incredible book that walks a woman through the whys, whats and hows of ejaculating during orgasm. Complete with anatomy references and drawing to make anyone drool, this book is a must have for anyone who has anything to do with a vulva.

Deborah's class "The Feminine Fountain: Female Ejaculation and the G-Spot" is being held at the CSPC on Friday, Oct. 22 at 8pm. This class is open to all genders. I have heard her speak in the past and am very excited to have the chance to attend a class!

At the other end of the weekend, if you liked Sex at Dawn: The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality you will want to be at the CSPC for An Intimate Evening with Author Christopher Ryan. With all the fascinating conversations this book as inspired among my community, I am quite curious.

I get to teach in Victoria!

2010-10-17T23:30:00.000-07:00

The first weekend of November, the 5th-7th, I will be at Sagacity of Victoria's Annual Birthday Bash & Kink Conference. "Head Games: Anatomy for Edge Play with the Head & Neck" and "Anatomy for Bondage" are the two classes I will be presenting on Saturday.

What does this mean? It means that I will officially be an international presenter. More exciting than that is the fact that I will get to use my new passport. I'll be taking the Clipper ferry over to Victoria, both firsts for me, with my lovely comrade presenter, Allena Gabosch, and Jim Duvall as my traveling companion.

If you don't have plans for that weekend, do consider taking a mini-vacation. The people I have talked to who have attended past Sagacity Bashes gave good reviews about how much fun they have had. I am hoping to get in a little sightseeing while I am in Vitoria, too. Check out the FetLife event page to see who else is going.

Look, Ma, no phobia! (Pt. 2)

2010-10-13T12:08:00.000-07:00

I found myself intrigued by my reaction. I became convinced that the art of fire dancing held the key to me overcoming my phobia. Within a few months I had found a mentor and began the process of learning to be a fire performer and a “safety” for other performers. I became proficient. But I didn’t erase the phobia; I learned how to disassociate enough so I could function safely with the fire. I didn’t feel the joy of spinning that so many talked about. I certainly didn’t love the sound of the fire roaring around me as it fought the wind resistance generated by spinning. What I felt was a sense of accomplishment and strength. I was proud that I had worked through my fear enough to be able to hold two fans, each with 5 wicks, or a 5 foot long staff with flaming ends. But I was also tense and focused and hypersensitive to whatever I perceived as the slightest lapse in safety.

1st fire dance- Photo by G. Siano, 2006

When I was deemed ready to “light up” I was nervous, to say the least. Focusing on the safety protocols and preparations helped keep me from flying into a panic at what I was about to do. The the amount of will power required to continue after the completion of each step in the process to light up steadily increased. I felt like I was scraping the bottom of the barrel by the time my mentor stood in front of me with the lighter asking if I was ready. With a nod yes and the proffered end of my staff, it started.

From that point on, I regularly performed with fire for about 2 years. It got easier, though only to a point. I refused to learn to fire eating or breathing. While I didnt' refuse, I did avoid doing any contact work, even doing fire contact on another was difficult. Eventually, my performance partner convinced me to feed him fire as part of a sexy dessert skit for the Little Red Studio. The first time we did the rehearsal with fire, I just about threw up from the anxiety. I preferred to stick with using my fans, as then at least I could feel like I had full control over the movement of the fire. Spinning the staff was harder; the momentum made for more possibility to lose control of the fire.

Eventually, I came to the conclusion that performing with fore wasn't reducing the scope of my phobia. Nothing had changed in my relationship to fire outside of performing. And even then, I wasn't overcoming the fear, I was just managing it when I performed. So, I stopped spinning. I still kept my tools, as they were all custom made for me, and one of them by me. In the back of my head, I thought I would try again in the future.

Enter hypnosis. Jim is, among all his other talents, a certified hypnotherapist. Using hypnosis as a tool for resolving phobias is a fairly common thing and there are a number of different approaches to choose from based on the circumstances at hand. Regression was a good tool once we realized that we had to do it repeatedly in order to pull off the layers. Parts therapy ground the process to a halt, but was still illuminating. There was about a month with hard emotional work of processing and integrating everything I learned about where the phobia came from.

Last weekend, Jim & I did a photo shoot we have been talking about for years. He has wanted to learn how to photograph fire performances, which takes a fair amount of practice. I was finally eager to spin for him, rather than just willing to help out. While we didn't get any art out of the shoot, I discovered that I truly had worked through the phobia: I felt joy, giggling bubbling up to the surface, as I worked the fire around me. The huge grin captured in the photos said it all.

Jim pointed out to me that he had never seen that look on my face before when I performed with fire. He said I always looked nervous and tense. And not just in the pre-show jitters kind of way. More like I was using every ounce of self control to not throw the fire tool as far away from me as possible. Looking back through all the photos I have of me performing, I see he is right; even in the photos where I am smiling, it's pasted on, lacking any joy in my eyes.

Now, I go forward. I want to increase my skill set to include contact staff. All the work I currently admire and skills I envy are in that arena. It means getting closer to the fire, and I am excited that I can start practicing without panic attacks.

Look, Ma, no Phobia! (Pt. 1)

2010-10-11T10:51:00.001-07:00

As a child, I lived through numerous experiences where I was scared by fire and explosions. A phobia developed around being burned or fire going out of control. I had a lot of shame wrapped up in being scared of fire. I felt it was a failing that I was irrationally scared of something, that while dangerous, was normally controlled and so useful. People would tell me it was an understandable fear, and then be shocked to find out that pulling something out of the oven would take me to to the point of panic or that I was incapable of making barbecue.

I managed quite nicely in avoiding pushing against the phobia too often. When camping, I would stand with my back to the inevitable fire, being only near enough to keep myself warm. Occasionally, I would I find myself lamenting that I had to rely on others to make me barbecue. I managed to survive living two years in a house with a fireplace without having a nervous breakdown. Finding the condo with a gas fireplace turned out to be a great compromise between my fear and my then partner's love of having a fireplace in the home. I would always end up stressed out, often crying, on the Fourth of July; hating the family nature of the day that made my presence a requirement.

In the fall of 2000, during a First Thursday ArtWalk, I saw my first fire performance with my dear friend Ken. The woman was spinning poi (basically flaming balls on the ends of chain) and dancing around. Ken was enraptured and I was uncomfortable, even from our vantage point over 100 feet away. As she neared the end of her burn time, she knelt down and arched backward, spinning the poi in front of her body, arms outstretched and close together so that the fire looked to be tickling at her torso. As my panic rose, she stopped spinning and trailed the poi up her body and licked at the flame. I lost all semblance of control, spinning around, burst into tears and speed-walked away from the sight.

Ken dove head long into the fire arts. He learned in any how to spin staff, wield flaming whips and swords, among many other tools. He would kindly not mention details of what he was doing out of respect for my distress over the subject. 4 years later, he emailed me a video link saying that he was immensely pleased with himself and that while he knew I wasn't into it, he wanted to show me what he was doing. The video was him dancing with a woman while he was spinning a fire staff and she was dancing with fire bowls. And I found myself being turned on. By the beauty, by the artistry, by the chemistry between them. I immediately called him. "I can't believe that you just turned me on with fire!"

Fears

2010-09-29T21:08:00.001-07:00

I fear recrimination from women in regards to my sexuality.

It's a lingering thing. When I was a teenager, when sex was new and we all were trying to figure it out, I picked up a lot about people's attitudes regarding sex from how they reacted to tales of certain acts. Invariably, in my group of friends in my conservative small city, the girls reacted with scorn and disgust to anything kinky while the boys evinced awe and envy. One instance that stands out in my memory was when I was almost 17. I was going to junior college and had met a young woman who was 23 and had traveled to Europe, which meant she was far more sophisticated than me, right? She told me a story about a friend of hers who had bragged about how she could fit a guy's whole hand in her pussy. I remember being amazed and impressed while listening to the story. Then confused when my friend said it wasn't anything to be proud of. The finality of her pronouncement kept me from asking why not. The disdain was so clear that I certainly didn't want any of that emotion directed at me for thinking such an act was cool sounding.

Of course, years later, when I allowed myself to be fisted, I was unsurprised to discover that it was as cool as I thought it would be. And, of course, I didn't tell any of my female friends that I had tried it. (This was before I found the kinky community.)

Some of the hardest things for me to endure are scenes with sexual components in "mixed company". I worry that people will treat me different or like me less if they see what gets me off. With men, I worry they will think I will do that act with anyone, including them. With women, I worry about their perception of me as less than worthy. I have great admiration for women who play sexually in public play spaces. They must be especially secure and strong in their sense of self to do intimate acts where others can view and I want to be like them.

I'll continue with fisting as my example.

Once upon a time, the Mean Man kept threatening me with sex acts in semi-public settings. He enjoyed the fear & panic that played across my features, as well as other physical responses. For months, there was only talk. This resulted in complacence that he was only engaging in a mindfuck. Until one night, "Put on a short skirt and we'll go to the club tonight." At the time, I didn't think anything of his directive other than that he liked to see me wear short skirts. In retrospect, I should have seen what was coming. When he told me to get a glove & some lube from the safer sex supplies station, I knew what he had in mind: fisting me in public.

I was mortified. It was the Thursday Grind; one of the busiest parties of the week because of the new member orientation that happens before it, not to mention the great dance music. He tied me in a chest harness that secured my hands behind my back and thrust my breasts forward. As an added sensation and a visible cue that I was indeed playing and not to be talked to, nipple clamps, connected by a shiny silver chain. He positioned me standing next to a large, low chair that just happened to be next to the water cooler, in that grey zone between the social area and the play area. After instructing me to spread my legs, he pulled my panties down to my knees and encouraged me to keep my legs spread so that my panties didn't fall down any further.

He calmly sat down in the chair, put on the glove and ran his hand up my leg until he found my cunt. I was wet from the fear & the control he had: he could make me do something I was so scared of that I would never have even thought to ask for it. And "it" was horrible. And hot and, yes, I got really close to orgasm. Apparently, others thought it was hot, too. People started drinking a lot of water when they realized that his hand was disappearing up my skirt. Repeatedly refilling their Dixie cups in order to politely get a closer look at what was going on.

Afterward, I clung to the Mean Man, still feeling vulnerable and wanting his protection; scared to interact with anyone for fear of recrimination or ridicule. Walking around, with me practically hugging him from behind, he chatted with friends and I avoided eye contact or speaking to anyone. One of his dear friends, a beautiful woman whom I loved to watch dance, sashayed off the dance floor toward us. I buried my face in his shoulder while they traded pleasantries. I vaguely heard him mention something about still being in aftercare mode and soon she began grinding her magnificent ass into mine. Shock turned to pleasure as we spent a minute or two pressing and rubbing into each other. She gave me a little hug and sashayed on her way. Feeling dazed but smiling, I found myself grounded and comfortable again.

That was exactly what I needed: validation and acceptance from a woman. I don't have the fear as strong as I did before that experience. It's still there, dormant, flaring up when I hear a woman commenting on another woman's sexuality in a disparaging way. I have made it a personal crusade of gently challenging those disparaging remarks in the hopes of changing the narrow societal mores that say women shouldn't be "too overtly sexual".

I'm a Kinsey 2.695

2010-09-20T09:47:00.000-07:00

Kinsey Scale tee-shirts! The Kinsey Heterosexual-Homosexual Scale was devised by Alfred Kinsey & his co-researchers, Clyde Martin & Wardell Pomeroy to reflect the gradations found in the vast majority of the sexual histories they received in the 1940s & 1950s.

Just think, with these shirts, you could avoid putting the moves on someone with the "wrong" orientation. Those situations can not only be embarrassing, but also downright heart breaking.

I like the Kinsey Scale because it allows for movement. The concept that your position on the scale varies throughout your life respects that humans are not static creatures and that our sexuality is a malleable thing.

You may ask how I get such a convoluted number out of a such a simple scale. Well, here are all the factors I took into account when coming up with my number

ratio of men to women sexual partners
ratio of long term relationships with women to men
who I fantasize about when I masturbate
who catches my fancy walking down the street (random visual stimuli)
who I idly fantasize about

Ultimately, I think these types of labels work great as conversation starters, rather than conversation enders.

Good grief, Charlie Brown.

2010-09-19T08:35:00.000-07:00

My god-mother died and it was over a week before I found out. Turns out that her son have moved her up to Seattle earlier this year. I didn't know that either. I would have liked the chance to have seen her and attend her funeral.

There is a lot of anger and fussing going on in my head but nothing changes the fact that my Gramma Dorthy is gone and I am sad and miss her.

A dear friend directed me to a writing of her's regarding grief. It is truly beautiful. It reminded me that grief is what we call it when we have experienced love.

Shoes!

2010-09-17T08:19:00.000-07:00

Three people have sent me the link to Shoe Dazzle. Any one have any experience with this company? Do you like the shoes they pick out for you? What is the quality of the shoes? Are they brand names, off brands or knock-offs?

I adore sexy shoes, but I am quite particular.

PrideFoundation's Raffle with a Twist

2010-09-14T12:06:00.000-07:00

Pride Foundation is giving away $2,500 to a favorite nonprofit organization. Enter their FREE annual online Raffle with a Twist and please vote for the Foundation for Sex Positive Culture as your favourite nonprofit.

Raffle with A Twist is the Pride Foundation's chance to hear from you which organizations you care most about. One randomly drawn entry will win $2,500 - plus we'll give $1,000 to the most named organization in each of our funding states (Alaska, Idaho, Montana, Oregon and Washington). And, you'll receive a Pride Foundation Swag Bag.

It is easy and only takes a minute, so enter today at PrideFoundation.org .

Please pass this on, far and wide.

Please only one entry per person per email address. The winning organizations need to have a nondiscrimination policy that includes sexual orientation and gender identity and/or expression. Entry deadline is October 31, 2010. Full rules and details at PrideFoundation.org .

Checking in.

2010-09-11T11:17:00.000-07:00

I survived Paradise and promptly came down with a sickness upon re-entry, hence the lack of posting. At least Twitter doesn't take much energy; I've managed to partially keep up there.

I have many stories to share, but I am still low energy so here is a list with links, as available.

Doing a sneaky ninja scene with PopeBacon, that ended up not being so sneaky, dressed only in a ninja-style headscarf, black undies & ninja socks.
Wrassled in the pool with GrayDancer. I tapped out but he ended up with a sore shoulder and a kick to the chest. The Mean Man encourage him to take comfort in the fact that if he was hurt when playing with me, it meant he was the top.
Lots of interesting new connections and continuing traditions tweeted best by the Mean Man: "First dates, second dates, dates within dates and dates stuffed with Brie all at once at #paradiseunbound"
All my classes turned out great! Felt like we hit a home run with "Going Beyond Verbal Communication". It ended up being a constant reference point during the week of Paradise. I feel proud that people found being made aware of body language valuable.
Bought my first canes from RopeSparrow. In all honesty, the rich purple colour was the motivating factor. I ended up using them for the first time on her Master during our yearly play date at Paradise. Not having any detailed training on how to cane someone, I felt a little out of my skill set so I resorted to just poking him, punctuating each poke with commentary. "Poke! Poke! Poke!"

Paradise starts today!

2010-08-31T01:47:00.000-07:00

Tonight, after the opening ceremony, Jim Duvall & I will be teaching a workshop to kick off Paradise Unbound. In the past, this workshop has been free, as a gift for those attending the opening ceremony and a teaser to get people to come back for more.

We will be teaching "Going Beyond Verbal Communication" where we will focus on interpreting postures, facial expressions and mannerisms. This class will help you reduce the number of "Are you ok's" out of your play, allowing you to maintain the energy of your scene.

We have been having a great time researching this class. The two books I have gotten the most out of are The Definitive Book of Body Language and The Power of Body Language: How to Succeed in Every Business and Social Encounter. I must admit, I enjoyed and appreciated the former much more. The writing was light hearted with great summaries at the end of each chapter. The Reiman book was a bit over powering. Even the title was a bit much for me, as the book honestly focuses on manipulating your body language with specific goals in mind. Not that manipulation is always bad, it's just written in a sales & marketing & pep talk jargon sort of way that seems- false, for lack of a better word.

Seattle Erotic Art Festival seeks web designers

2010-08-30T06:33:00.000-07:00

Seattle Erotic Art Festival has immediate need for qualified volunteers to fill positions on our online team: online service directors, web developers and web designers, please contact us. We have ambitious and exciting plans to redesign and relaunch the website for 2011.

Qualified applicants should be well versed in modern web technologies, have strong examples of previous web work, and be excited about working within a larger marketing team. Please send letters of interest to info@seattleerotic.org.

Learn more and view the official call here.

New bike home safe & sound!

2010-08-30T00:05:00.000-07:00

What a lovely evening for the inaugural ride of Baby Blue. Baby is a 2000 Suzuki SV650 and she is all mine!

After a long day at work that left me exhausted and apathetic, riding was the perfect remedy. A remedy I have been without for far too long. I have gone without riding for 2 months at a stretch, but those times were of my choosing. With the Ninja stolen and wrecked right at the beginning of summer, every beautiful day has been a painful reminder that there were certain pleasures that were not available to me.

That's all behind me now. Baby is a sweet, nimble ride. When my friends were telling me they had the SV for sale, I tried to blow off the offer. Domenico made such a big deal about this being a perfect bike for me; I felt obligated to at least give it a sit and test ride.

The man knows his bikes, and he know me. I should have never doubted as this is indeed a perfect bike for me. Traitorous feelings arise in me when I think of how I might just like Baby better than my old Ninja. I do still miss the Ninja (I have enshrined it's license plan & the Ninja Devil Ducky that TFMK(tm) gave me and I mounted on the tail fairing) but I am no longer pining for it.

The Best corset Maker.

2010-08-28T20:38:00.000-07:00

Whenever I where my corset made by Jack of One Wilde Knight, I get the most wonderful compliments. Jack really does the most amazing job I have ever seen when it comes to custom corsets. Each article of clothing he makes is a true to era replication. I am convinced that, along with his supreme skills are why his corsets are so beloved.

I just found out that Jack has relocated to Seattle! If you have a desire to own a custom made corset, give him an email or a call. Even his "off the rack" corsets are head and shoulders above anyone else's off the rack styles. He has reasonable rates for alterations and the fitting sessions are a joy! There is truly something special about a charming "dirty old fellow" fussing over you and making sure you look divine.

End of summer classes.

2010-08-26T11:47:00.000-07:00

This has been a great summer for teaching, and I am ready to wrap up this season by heading out to Paradise Unbound August 31st though September 6th. Well, in all honesty, my day job is going to keep me from being out there all week long. Good thing that it's a quick drive to get there so I can fit in a few day trips before I settle in for the long weekend. I am very pleased to announce that I will be teaching 3 different classes over the course of the week.

On Tuesday, 8/31, at 8pm following the opening ceremony, Jim Duvall and I will give our "Beyond Verbal Communication" class. This class focuses on broadening your communication skills to include reading postures, facial expressions and mannerisms.

On Friday, 9/3, starting at 1pm, I will guide you through Stretching and Conditioning for Bondage. This is a hands on style class with only a little bit of lecture. Make sure to wear loose clothing for easy movement. If the weather is nice enough, we'll stretch and learn in the sun. Last year I taught in the stone circle and I am praying for sun so I can do that again.

On Sunday, 9/5, at 1pm, Jim and I will team up again for "Bondage for Sadists & Masochists". This is light on lecture and heavy on demo. Definitely not to be missed if you want to learn more or new ideas on how to use rope to be mean.

As a side note, earlier that same day, at 10am, Jim will be presenting "Relating to Rope" which focuses on (re)discovering your personal relationship with rope. This is an incredible class that bears repeating, as our kink and interests change over time.

Toe update!

2010-08-25T09:51:00.000-07:00

Healing is commencing at a satisfactory pace.

I have been a bit nervous about giving a report on my toe. Seems like every time someone asks me how it's healing I say "great!" and then later that day smack it on something, causing it to swell and ache for a day or two.

I wore high heels when I went to see "My Time with the Lady". That worked ok for the first half hour. After that, it was increasingly uncomfortable. Even sitting down, if my foot was on the floor, the position that the shoe dictated was still putting pressure on the littlest toe.

This reminds me that I haven't given my review of "My Time with the Lady". The short version is that I highly recommend it. I found it to be a beautiful testament of how essential a vibrant sex life for humans to be whole & happy. I was pleased that masturbation was being put forth as a valid way to express one's sexuality. I am quite partial to Ron, the co-writer and actor, so I thought I should give some non-biased reviews. The Seattle PI did a write up as did the Seattle Weekly, complete with horrible puns. The Everett Herald even wrote up a nice review. Go, Everett!

You can still buy tickets online or at the Little Red Studio box office (400 Dexter Ave. N.) when the doors open at 7:30pm on Thursday the 26th, Saturday the 28th and Sunday the 29th. This is the last weekend of this play's run.

Quote of the Day

2010-08-24T09:47:00.000-07:00

"I didn't like that. Why are my panties wet?"

(I guess this is more like the quote of the week. I won't be calling it that as that would imply I was keeping score.)

Wow- just, wow.

2010-08-23T00:08:00.000-07:00

Check out this Wired article on Mallakhamb, an Indian martial art that combines gymnastics with aerial work on a pole. Truly awe inspiring, and admittedly a bit nerve wracking.

More chatting with Dr. Dick

2010-08-19T12:58:00.000-07:00

My second visit to Dr. Dick's Sex Advice pod cast is live and ready for a listen. In this segment we ended up talking a lot about art, porn, performing, modeling and orgasms!

Part 1 can be heard here. There is one mention in the second part to the first pod cast, so you may want to give part 1 a listen first if you haven't already heard it.

A big thank you to Dr. Dick for inviting me to be on his pod cast and for being a lovely host and charming interviewer!

Shenanigan Report!

2010-08-18T12:56:00.000-07:00

Last Saturday, TwistedMonk and I had a blast playing around with shape-making during a suspension. He did a fabulous write up on his blog with a few photos. That afternoon while putting up the rigging for his big party at the Little Red Studio, he told me of his crazy plan.

"So, do you have anyone in mind to do that with?"

"I'm looking at her."

"I'm in!"

That was all of our planning. Maybe we will workshop it into something more performance like. That was a great spectacle for his guests, and a complete blast, but not polished or smooth. There is much to be said for jumping in and just seeing what happens.

I'm excited to see the rest of the photos. Big thanks to Malixe for the photography and permission to post!

Quote of the Day

2010-08-16T10:59:00.000-07:00

"Before you say anything else, you need to know that Sophia & I go way back. I will always have her back, even if I was pretty sure she was wrong. I would help her hide the body. I would help her hide your body. Just so you know, so you avoid saying anything you might want to take back later."

New Earworm

2010-08-15T13:04:00.000-07:00

I have had this song stuck in my head since it was sent to me last week. If you haven't heard it already, you must to check out "Fuck Me, Ray Bradbury". I am a huge sci-fi fan so this tickles my fancy just perfectly!

Not safe for work, but mostly due to the repeated use of the word fuck. While there is lots of cleavage to enjoy, no full nudity.

Fuck Me, Ray Bradbury	UCBcomedy.com

Watch more comedy videos from the twisted minds of the UCB Theatre at UCBcomedy.com

After party reporting.

2010-08-15T11:48:00.000-07:00

Last night I went to and 80s prom themed party in honour of TwistedMonk's business and birth anniversary. My dear PopeBacon and I decided that punk was where it was at.

While we were prepping for the evening's shenanigans, a flossing mishap left me with a mouthful of blood. I asked him if it would be in character to have blood on my shirt. He gave me the thumbs up which turned into a whoop of delight when I spit the blood out so it ran down my shirt front.

Since the Mean Man is out of town teaching a workshop, I made sure to keep him up to date, including photos.

Another play!

2010-08-13T11:39:00.000-07:00

My time with the Lady. Performances run Thurs 8/19-Sat 8/21, Thu 8/26, Sat 8/28, Sun 8/29, and all performances start at 8 pm.

A dear friend of mine has co-written and stars in an autobiographical play about his time working at the Seattle Lusty Lady. The Lusty lady was the first "strip club" I ever went to and it was an exhilarating experience. The rush of adrenaline that accompanied the act of shrugging off societies mores. The sheer naughty factor was always so yummy. Whenever I had business to attend to downtown, I would go into the Lady and pop a quarter in the slot, eager for the window to raise so I could see the beauties moving and dancing in their mirrored room. 25 cents gave me a glimpse that hovered in the back of my mind all day.

I miss the Lusty Lady.

I am very excited that this play will be opening next week. I already have a date and a ticket for the opening show on August 19th. Hope to see you there!

Dr. Dick's Podcast

2010-08-11T10:07:00.000-07:00

Today is the day that my interview with Dr. Dick is broadcast!

This was so much fun and would gladly do it again. It is very interesting hearing myself chatter on. Hope you all enjoy listening in on our chat.

Volunteer at ParadiseUnbound 2010

2010-08-10T11:14:00.000-07:00

ParadiseUnbound is a wonderful event that the Foundation for sex Positive Culture puts on each year to celebrate sexuality. There are workshops that focus on skills that benefit your relationships, your play and sexuality; opportunities for relaxation, camping and play abound with nightly entertainment. Paradise would not be possible if not for the time and efforts of our volunteers.

Volunteer opportunities during the week include working at: Registration, in the Kitchen, Hospitality, Information, Entertainment Set-Up, as well as help with set up and tear down before and after Paradise.

In addition to providing an important service that keeps the cost of Paradise reasonable and builds community, volunteers also receive a $10 per hour discount on registration, up to $20 a day and up to $100 for the week.

Please email our Paradise Volunteer Coordinator:

For a complete description of volunteer positions available for Paradise
If you would like to be a part of the set up crew or tear down crew for Paradise
If you are planning on coming early or staying late as a volunteer

Please do not show up expecting to be a part of set up without notifying our Volunteer Coordinator.

To sign up to be a volunteer just make a note on your registration or email the Paradise Volunteer Coordinator

To volunteer for Security at Paradise please email our Paradise Security Lead.

Survived!

2010-08-08T19:16:00.000-07:00

The run up to this class has been exhausting. I was so glad to finally be there, standing in front of a room full of people curious about genital anatomy with a completed lesson plan in my hands. And it went well. There were great questions and only a little bit of technical difficulties.

I am grateful for everyone who showed up and were a part of the class. I love teaching and sharing information; today was a fine example of information exchange!.

Now that 's finished, I can get back to shenanigans.

Genital Anatomy Class - 8/8 2-4pm

2010-08-04T01:49:00.000-07:00

Join me this Sunday for a fun filled 2 hours exploring the physiology of our fun bits!

You can read more on the Center for Sex Positive Culture's website. See who else is going by visiting the FetLife event page.

If you have any questions about the class, feel free to send me a message.

Not again!

2010-08-03T11:37:00.000-07:00

*grumble grouse grumble*

Last night, after a lovely R&D scene with a bendy beauty, I stubbed my baby toe on the mats that I had used to be safe. Yes, the same toe I broke last month. This incident hurt just as much, if not a smidge more than the first injury.

I still don't want to go to a clinic. I don't have a regular doctor in Seattle and it's not terribly convenient to go to the last GP I had. Going into to urgent care clinics or the walk-in clinic has been very hit and miss. Sometimes I get taken care of beautifully, and other times I am shuttled through and my questions brushed off. The brush offs are particularly disheartening. I consider my health to be of supreme importance and to have a professional not answer my questions with detail limits my ability to heal. I know that's silly that only a few medical professionals have given me a bad taste in my mouth about the whole of western emergency medicine.

More art.

2010-08-01T10:35:00.000-07:00

I was so excited to be helping with the coppertone puppy shoot I completely forgot to post about a shoot I modeled in with Jim Duvall. This was also an idea that had been gestating for a while. It started as mutually applied clay body mask with contact improv dance added in. That obviously needed to be a performance rather than just something we did for fun by ourselves. While performing, someone snapped a few photos that made us want something more professionally done. This whole process took over 2 years!

I am very pleased to offer you version one of this shoot. We are already thinking of how we want to tweak the application of the clay and the dance moves/poses that worked well for the next shoot.

2010-2214 by *JimDuvall on deviant ART

Another chance to buy SEAF art!

2010-07-29T09:48:00.000-07:00

This Saturday, July 31st, the Center for Sex Positive Culture is having a Vendor Fair. The CSPC is where the Foundation for Sex Positive Culture hosts the majority of it's events, except for the Seattle Erotic Art Festival due to the sheer size of the event.

SEAF is going to have a booth at the Vendor Fair and I will be there selling SEAF shirts, posters & catalogs as well as with a smattering of art from 2010 and previous years' exhibition. Art prices are negotiable, so don't be shy about making an offer. Come by, buy some art or that t-shirt you didn't get a chance to pick up at the Festival and visit me.

There will be lots of other fun vendors there, as well. Jim Duvall will have a booth with his art for sale, including both large and small pieces. Kinky Medical will be in attendance with their naughty wares. Come visit Kinky Caesura, owned by Sparrow, and check out her hand crafted Rattan Canes in variety of lengths and colors.

The 'Back to School' Vendor Fair

What:

Socialize and shop at our free vendor fair

Schedule:

Saturday, July 31, 2010

When:

11:00 AM to 5:00 PM

Where:

1602 15th Ave W Seattle, WA map

Who:

18+.

Cost:

$3 to $5 Suggested donation at the door but not required for admission. CSPC membership NOT required to attend.

Quote of the Day

2010-07-26T12:56:00.000-07:00

"You know when you are talking to someone and you can tell they aren't listening to you? Of course you do- you're in a relationship with me. So, anyway, you know what I'm talking about..."

Yay for art!

2010-07-23T13:54:00.000-07:00

Whenever I get the chance to assist with a photo shoot, I jump. I love being on the backside of producing an image and I find doing prep or make-up or being an extra set of hands to the artist is immensely satisfying. Often more satisfying than modeling.

Last night I helped Jim Duvall with an image he has wanted to do for years. I was in charge of painting the "puppy" and making sure the girl had a tan and a tan line. It's a pretty damn good job to have!

2010-2331 by *JimDuvall on deviant ART

The puppy play fetish fascinates me, now. Before hand, my reaction to it on an intellectual level is neutral. I was unprepared for my reaction to the reality of it. I suddenly felt like a little kid with an impulse to pet and play with the "puppy".

When Jim declared the shoot a success, he asked if Alex wanted any shots as a puppy before cleaning up. After a few shots, I burst out "Can I have my picture taken with the puppy, too?" They indulged my request and I have the goofiest grin while petting this painted, hooded human pretending to be a puppy. It was delightfully freeing to sink into that headspace of petting and cooing over a puppy that was happy for attention, leaning into me, returning my affection just the way a dog would. It was really cool. I get it.

A Summer Public Service Announcement:

2010-07-22T06:44:00.000-07:00

Alexa Ara and her whimsical and practical Beginner's Guide to Romp & Tromping.

I'm a grown up!

2010-07-19T10:29:00.000-07:00

My first grey hair!

No one I have shown this to in person has been excite or interested. This is a right of passage! This marks the beginning of a new period of my life. At least I have always assumed that going grey would mean something.

I associate grey hair with mature individuals who are responsible and distinguished. I'm definitely responsible. Distinguished is fairly open ended in my case. One can have many different things about them that are distinguished, right?

Oh I give up. Grey hair is hot! I don't need any other reason than that to be excited.

More theater!

2010-07-16T07:10:00.000-07:00

When a dear friend of mine put out the call for an audience for the final dress rehearsal of Pageant Play, I figured why not help out a friend. When you have been working on a piece of theater, you get to a point when you need a fresh audience to test out timing. Also, Kerry promised me it would be funny.

And she was right. Oh my! We laughed so hard and about a variety of things. There were a lot of gags and lines that I both laughed and cringed at simultaneously. I mean, let's face it, child beauty pageants are both horrific and hilarious; the production did the subject matter justice. I absolutely loved it!

The acting was superb! Normally, you get to dress rehearsals there is the idea that everyone is still settling in. Not this cast. Each one gave clean deliveries and were entrenched in their characters. Both men play dual roles, a pageant coach and a husband. At the end of the play, there is a section where all the characters are running through a large house and these two guys are running by as "Bobby" and then as a husband with literally 30 seconds in between. The characters were so well differentiated that I didn't realize that the only difference in one actor's costumes was his shirt. It wasn't until he came out once and you could see the hem of one shirt peeking out from the other that I noticed the 2 characters had almost identical outfits. The physical acting was so strong, I didn't even notice until there was a slip up!

They made full use of multiple entrances throughout, especially for set changes. Often a character would set up or strike a set in character as part of the play. I like that convention of maintaining the illusion. There was a bit of breaking the fourth wall, and it was done in context. I have mixed feelings about this, so I am pleased it was worked nicely into the play without becoming dependent on audience participation.

I want to write more, but I am too nervous to give away anything. It was a real joy experiencing the twists and turns in the plot. You have every Friday and Saturday from now until August 14th to see for yourself. You can buy tickets online or at the door. I recommend purchasing online because Theater Schmeater only seats 49, an that fills up fast. They also keep a waiting list at the door, which I have had good luck with in the past.

Embarking on an adventure.

2010-07-15T00:54:00.000-07:00

I posted my first personal ad. I am terribly nervous and excited.

The idea of putting something like this online for the whole world to see, to ignore or reply to, is daunting.

Squeeeeee!

2010-07-13T09:22:00.000-07:00

There is a fun podcast series that I enjoy called Dr. Dick's Sex Advice. I first started hearing about it earlier this year from some friends of mine, so I did what everyone else does and followed their links to it and was charmed by his easy going manner and wit. Dr. Dick has a lovely interview style that reminds me of Bill Moyers in that he leads, steers and prods his guest gently so that the information and conversation flows beautifully.

So I got a note from him asking me if he could talk to me as part of his Sex Wisdom series. Me? Really?! That's so cool! After a few moments of fan-girl-ing out, I collect myself and gave him a call. I managed to not blurt out that he really doesn't want me on his show, as I didn't want to imply he had bad taste or anything in what/who he found interesting. It's more a matter that I am a bit concerned that I will not be up to the level of people he is used to working with and scared that I am not that interesting.

We had a lovely chat that culminated in how talking to people about anatomy in relation to their sex lives is something that doesn't come up near enough. Looks like we might have a topic! More details when they are finalized.

The story of my Injury.

2010-07-12T05:18:00.000-07:00

I realized that in all the hubbub of reporting on the status of my healing toe, I have neglected to share how I came to be in this state.

Short of it:
I tripped and broke my pinky toe.

Long of it:
I was just trying to be safe. Really! I was suspending a dear friend of mine and was doing my very best to be safe. We had wrestling mats down and I had taken off my heels. After much frolicking, we got a little more serious and the movement become for aggressive on both our parts. I gave him a strong push. Stepping back to avoid his arms reaching for me as he sung back toward me, my foot caught my high heeled shoes. The baby toe on my right foot was pulled back and away from the midline.

The pain was awful. But then, stubbing your toe is always worse feeling than the damage you sustain. The pain persisted. I reached down to squeeze my toe, knowing that putting pressure on an area that is painful often settles the sensations down. I heard and felt a crunch that was immediately followed by more pain. At this point, we called the scene.

I motioned for his partner to come over and promptly sent her for and ice pack. In the mean time, I stood on one foot and untied my bottom. He's a rigger when he isn't being tied up by me, so he tried to help. I let him undo a few of the up lines, and insisted I could finish taking the rope off of him while we both sat. He fussed over my foot, that I was dutifully icing by this point, and I untied him and coiled my rope. It is quite important to me to have that resolving act. The swelling slowed, then began going down, giving cause for relief.

At first, because of the sound and movement upon grasping my toe, I assumed it was dislocated, put back in place and I was only dealing with a sprain injury. Not terrible, but an awful long recovery ahead of me. The fact it was the pinky toe made it not as big of a deal. I had an appointment with a chiropractor the next day already scheduled, so I asked his opinion about getting it x-rayed. His was the same as mine: if it's broken, the doctor will just tell me to tape it up. If it's sprained, they'll tell me tape it up. He handed me some tape and sent me on my way with the advice of keeping shoes on and walking was ok.

Well, walking was/is not ok. I was throwing my hips and low back out of alignment walking in such a fashion so as to not increase the pain in my toe. So I went and bought crutches. Now that got me around much faster, which makes up for the inconvenience. Shouldn't have gotten rid of the pair I had after the last foot injury a year ago.

As the swelling has gone down, I realized that my toe was noticeably crooked. Ok, then I broke it. This is the first bone I have broken and I don't have a good story to go along with how I got it. The Mean Man says I can honest say that I have only broken one bone and I set it myself. That sounds pretty burly. I can roll with that. I'll just gloss over the fact that it was a toe and I tripped.

Still with the hurt toe.

2010-07-11T21:09:00.000-07:00

Toe Update!

Ummm, I think I broke it. As the swelling keeps going down, I can see that my baby toe is crooked. It wasn't crooked last week.

I am still on crutches and I figure I will stay on them a little while longer. While at home, I tend to not use them as it's a wee apartment. Please don't lecture me about moving it as much as I can to keep the circulation going; I hobble around quite a bit. Enough to make it hurt and remind me that I should be on the crutches.

Shine: The Musical

2010-07-09T15:04:00.000-07:00

I should confess that I was somewhat conflicted about hearing of this production. On one hand, I LOVE musicals. On the other, I really don't care for burlesque. Really, it's a bit on the rare side to think "wow, I can't believe she took her bra off!" when watching burlesque. Dan Savage wrote a thoughtful article that addressed the danger that the Seattle burlesque scene is currently courting. His article soothed my conscience in my decision to whole-heartedly endorse Shine: A Burlesque Musical.

I was invited to attend the final dress rehearsal and I was blown away. I loved it! The premise is not terribly original, but I contend that a familiar plot line makes for easier likability. You have the thought "Oh, I see what kind of story this is going to be" and you settle in. The story has a few surprises that were completely unexpected and still very much in the spirit of the characters and story. I love it when I can't see something coming in the plot.

The music, written by The Wet Spots, was fun and well done. The singers smoldered and thankfully the tech supported them nicely. (Too often in smaller productions the sound and or light systems detract from the quality of the performance. I am pleased to report that was not the case in Shine.) The choreography, by Inga Ingenue who is an incredible dancer and burlesque artist in her own right, was a real treat. All the dance numbers were sexy, crisp in execution and engaging. I honestly enjoyed every one.

Best of all, Shine has a beautiful message of honouring and expressing one's sexuality in a way that is neither trite, nor preachy. As a production associated with the Foundation for Sex Positive Culture, they can rest assured that Shine follows their mission. Their 18+ notice on the website says it quite nicely: "SHINE is an adult-oriented show which contains nudity and themes of healthy sexuality. The producers and writers of this show think this is a Very Good Thing."

I highly recommend you go see Shine, either this weekend or the next. Tickets are available online, and if you are free this (Friday) evening, the 10:30pm show is having a 2-for-1 special if you use the secret code: LuLu.

Day 3

2010-07-04T13:01:00.000-07:00

The colours visible on my toe are much more vibrant today. Most likely because I spent 7 hours on my feet teaching. I wasn't able to go out and get crutches before my classes started. On a healing stand point, that was bad. On a teaching stand point, it was way better not having to maneuver around as a 3 legged creature. By the end of the evening, I was in a fair amount of pain that even elevating and icing my foot didn't reduce.

It was worth it, though. My classes went really smoothly. I am already getting emails and tweets of thanks. One person wanted to let me know that he has "already put the theory into practice, with quite favorable results.' Squeeeeeee! It's comments like these that really light me up. Spreading and increasing joy is why I teach.

*an hour later*

I am pleased to report that I have procured a pair of crutches and I am ready for the rest of my day. I had to strike a deal of putting my foot up for most of the day in exchange for getting to go to the nursery and pick out plants for our mini-garden. Then it's a mellow day of planting, BBQing and friends. Everyone have a safe & happy 4th!

Palpation opportunity!

2010-07-03T10:27:00.000-07:00

Good news for y'all who are coming to the palpation class today!

I sprained my little toe really bad and I have some decent inflammation going on there. The picture was taken yesterday afternoon and it is worse now due to a silly re-injury last night. This means that everyone who attends will get the chance to palpate inflamed tissue; an invaluable experience for being able to recognize the presence of the inflammatory response when there are no visible signs.

My life is in the service of science.

All ready!

2010-07-03T00:30:00.000-07:00

Finished the final rewrite of my Palpation for Rope Play class and I am finally very happy with it. I have been fussing all week long; vacillating between two versions. I had a conversation during lunch today that settled my indecision. This is going to be good!

The Anatomy 101 for BDSM, which I meant to rename Anatomy 101 for Kink, has been updated a bit to reflect some information that I seem to be repeating a lot when people come up to me with questions.

This will be a full day of learning fun stuff, starting at 12:30pm for the Anatomy class. An hour break between classes and then back to it with the Palpation class starting at 5:30pm.

See you there!